To fathom even further the potentially fatal absurdity of the Bergdahl-Taliban prisoner exchange, just imagine that it’s June 1943. Rather than Franklin Delano Roosevelt, Obama is in the Oval Office. The American armed forces have captured and then detained scores of high-level Nazis at the U.S. Navy base at Guantanamo Bay, which America opened in southeastern Cuba in December 1903. Currently, 149 Nazi heavyweights remain at Gitmo. Nonetheless, Obama wants to close the Guantanamo Detention Camp because, well . . . just because.
Among Gitmo’s top Nazis, Berlin has insisted for years that it wants five specific prisoners released: Heinrich Himmler, Adolf Eichmann, Joseph Goebbels, Rudolf Hess, and Wilhelm Keitel. The German government unwaveringly has demanded these five detainees as they have negotiated this matter with Obama. For his part, Obama clearly has demolished America’s previously stalwart policy of not negotiating with Nazis.
Thus, Obama has agreed to exchange the Nazi Five for Sergeant Bowe Bergdahl, a U.S. soldier who left his post in the desert of North Africa as General George S. Patton battled Nazi general Erwin Rommel. Did Bergdahl simply wander off, AWOL, and then get swiped by the Afrika Korps? Did he, more affirmatively, desert the Army? Was he, even worse, a full-out Nazi collaborator? Now that he is back in American hands, debriefing Bergdahl should answer these and other questions, which rage at home.
The controversy began as soon as this story broke. Bergdahl’s parents came to the White House to stand beside Obama in the Rose Garden as he announced the prisoner swap. Perhaps in solidarity with his son’s captors, Bob Bergdahl sported a square moustache.
“I’m your father, Bowe,” the elder Bergdahl said. “The people of Germany, the same.” He thanked Obama in English and then added, “Sieg Heil! Deutschland über alles!”
These comments seemed to parallel another statement that the elder Bergdahl tried to erase from the record. As he once wrote: “I am still working to free all Nazi prisoners. God will repay for the death of every German child. Amen.”
A U.S. military transport flew the Nazi Five to Madrid, where Generalissimo Francisco Franco has given assurances that he will keep close tabs on these top Teutons. However, it now transpires that the Nazi leaders will not be incarcerated. Rather, they will be free to visit Barcelona, Granada, or any place they like within Spain. Also, nothing will stop them from visiting the German Embassy or any of its consulates. From such venues, if they wish, these Nazis securely may contact Berlin and offer their advice and ideas for defeating the Allied war effort.
Under Obama’s accord with Franco, the top Nazis may travel as they wish after one year — even back to Germany. This should put them in Berlin around mid-June 1944, about two weeks after an Allied landing that is rumored to be in the works for somewhere on France’s Normandy coast.
The vicious, Nazi anti-Semites whom Obama traded for Sergeant Bergdahl turn out to be eerily similar in rank and stature to their equally Jew-hating Taliban counterparts.
• Nazi interior minister Heinrich Himmler and former Taliban interior minister Khair Ulla Said Wali Khairkhwa are rough equals.
• Deputy Gestapo chief Adolf Eichmann and former deputy chief of Afghan intelligence Abdul Haq Wasiq are about on par.
• Nazi Minister of Propaganda and Public Enlightenment Paul Joseph Goebbels and the Taliban’s chief of communications Mohammad Nabi Omari share analogous portfolios.
• Deputy Führer Rudolf Hess and Mullah Norullah Noori are peers. U.S. intelligence describes Noori as “directly subordinate to Mullah Omar” of the Taliban, much as Hitler placed Hess immediately below him in the Nazi hierarchy.
• Wehrmacht chief of staff Wilhelm Keitel and the Taliban’s army chief of staff Mullah Mohammad Fazl actually share the same title.
So, one question-plagued U.S. GI has come home and Herren Himmler, Eichmann, Goebbels, Hess, and Keitel are back in Europe while U.S. soldiers are helmet-deep in a shooting war with the Third Reich.
What possibly could go wrong?
According to former secretary of state Hillary Clinton, none of this should worry Americans at all. “These five guys are not a threat to the United States,” she comforted NBC News. “They are a threat to the safety and security of England and France.”
This entire scenario seems perfectly normal to Obama, especially the timing of his prisoner swap. As he explained, “This is what happens at the end of wars.”
Echoing Obama, Secretary of State John Kerry responded to warnings by congressional Republicans and some Democrats that the Nazi Five would return to battle against America and its allies. “I just think that’s a lot of baloney,” Kerry said. “We are ending our combat role. Our combat role in Europe is over.”
Of course, U.S. forces currently exchanging bullets and artillery with the enemy might dispute Obama and Kerry’s belief that fire has ceased.
“The world is less violent than it has ever been,” Obama, beamed last Wednesday, no doubt basking in what he considers the brilliance of his Bergdahl-Nazi swap: “It is healthier than it has ever been. It is more tolerant than it has ever been.”
Soon after making these comments, Obama flew to Palm Springs for the weekend. He stayed at a gated community called Thunderbird Heights and played his 175th and 176th rounds of golf since entering the White House, five years and five months ago. (By comparison, G. W. Bush played 24 rounds of golf in his entire eight-year presidency.)
Gott sei Dank hat Roosevelt gegen Hitler gekämpft. Wäre Obama im Zweiten Weltkrieg Präsident gewesen, würden Sie diese Zeilen wahrscheinlich auf deutsch lesen.
Translation: Thank God Roosevelt battled Hitler. Were Obama president during World War II, you probably would be reading these words in German.
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Note: All of Obama’s comments above are real, recent quotes.
Hillary Clinton is paraphrased above. Referring to the Taliban Five, she actually told NBC’s Today on June 11: “These five guys are not a threat to the United States. They are a threat to the safety and security of Afghanistan and Pakistan.”
Secretary of State John Kerry also is paraphrased. “I just think that’s a lot of baloney,” Kerry told CNN on June 7. “We are ending our combat role. Our combat role in Afghanistan is over.”
Wearing a long, Taliban-style beard beside Obama, Bob Bergdahl, in fact, said, “I’m your father, Bowe. The people of Afghanistan, the same.” He also declared in the Rose Garden, “In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.” He earlier wrote: “I am still working to free all Guantanamo prisoners. God will repay for the death of every Afghan child, ameen.”
— Deroy Murdock is a Manhattan-based Fox News Contributor and a media fellow with the Hoover Institution on War, Revolution and Peace at Stanford University. Oliver Olah, a Frankfurt-based fellow alumnus of the American Council on Germany’s Young Leaders Program, provided German-language translation for this piece. Rabbi Aryeh Spero, author of Push Back: Reclaiming Our American Judeo-Christian Ethos, also suggests looking at the Bergdahl-Taliban fiasco in the context of World War II.