Let’s get creative!
Imagine a scandal that would force Hillary Clinton to drop out of the 2016 presidential race.
This Republican fantasy scenario stems from a genuine curiosity concerning the types of circumstances, events, or disclosures that would be judged so distasteful that even after the Clintons’ usual obfuscation, they would still be unable to weasel their way out.
What follows is a reality-based political exercise (that might even contain some future headlines) exploring the outer limits of the exceptionally high tolerance level for Clinton scandals among most Democrats and their media allies.
Surely by now any “normal” presidential candidate would have been forced to withdraw from the race, and would have done so in disgrace. (Imagine if Condi Rice were running for the GOP nomination and had done what Hillary did with her State Department e-mails.)
My first fantasy “scandal” is based on recent revelations that the Russians hacked into the White House computer system and have been reading Obama’s unclassified e-mails. It is safe to assume that, along with Obama’s e-mails, the Russians have read all of Clinton’s, too, including those boring, deleted, “personal” ones detailing her yoga routines and Chelsea’s wedding plans.
But what if WikiLeaks revealed that the Russians were blackmailing Hillary? What if Putin threatened to release Mrs. Clinton’s most damaging “personal” e-mails — knowing full well their contents could derail her campaign? Then, in order to salvage her presidential hopes, Mrs. Clinton secretly agreed that the Russians could “peacefully expand” into all of Ukraine and the Baltics once she was elected president?
Would such revelations topple her candidacy?
Probably not, because perennial Clinton defender James Carville would dismiss all the accusations, telling Fox News, “Those Russians are part of the vast red-wing commie conspiracy.”
Then the media would simply move on upon hearing rumors that a Triple X sex scandal was about to explode.
This new distraction would involve a secret video showing Bill Clinton cavorting with underage sex slaves on “Orgy Island,” an infamous Caribbean retreat owned by convicted-pedophile Jeffrey Epstein.
Somehow you know that Team Clinton would convince the media to dismiss this new “fake” video as old news.
But what if it were revealed that while president, Bill Clinton frequently received oral sex in the Oval Office from a young female intern and later lied about it? Would that disgrace the Clintons and kill Hillary’s chances of being elected president?
Oh wait, that is ancient news. Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t L’Affaire Monica actually help Hillary get elected to the U.S. Senate after she successfully played both the strong-woman and victim cards? (And, for the record, President Bill Clinton experienced his highest-ever job approval rating of 73 percent while being impeached by the House.)
Since Russian blackmail and island sex-slave scandals are not enough to oust the Clintons, how about that good ol’ American tradition of income-tax fraud?
This type of scandal has real potential considering that the Clintons last released their personal tax returns back in 2008 when Hillary first ran for president. However, that release only covered the years 2000–06, well before the time she became Secretary of State and Bill’s Clinton’s speaking fees began to dramatically increase.
Here then are some new, intertwining, personal and Clinton Foundation tax developments that could make the jump from scandal fantasy to headline reality. First, the background.
Will the Clintons be forced to revise their personal tax returns for at least five years due to the ripple effect caused by their foundation’s accounting “mistakes”?
“We had previously evaluated this organization, but have since determined that this charity’s atypical business model cannot be accurately captured in our current rating methodology.”
(All the GOP candidates are thinking, “If only that statement could fit on a bumper sticker.”)
The Clinton Foundation’s shady dealings are now under increased scrutiny by such media outlets as the New York Times — which detailed intriguing relationships between the players in a Russian uranium deal and millions of dollars donated to the foundation.
This “atypical business model” also prompts the question of the day: Will the Clintons be forced to revise their personal tax returns for at least five years due to the ripple effect caused by their foundation’s accounting “mistakes”? This would make right now the perfect time for Republican presidential candidates to demand that Hillary and Bill release their personal tax returns from 2007–14 and then again after the Foundation cleans up their IRS-form-990 mess.
However, the Clintons would certainly find a way to downplay any complicated tax scandal with the predictable excuse that “our accountant did it,” and the story would last a week.
Then of course, there is no chance that Obama’s highly politicized IRS would have the incentive, or the guts, to audit the Clintons. After all, a Hillary presidency is Obama’s best shot at maintaining a legacy.
Unfortunately for our nation, the Clintons know how to play all the angles from every angle.
Therefore, I have concluded that nothing short of a murder conviction would force Hillary to drop out of the 2016 presidential race.
With that in mind, the GOP should launch a full investigation of the infamous Clinton body count, a long list of all their dead “friends” and associates. (I think that was a joke.)
— Myra Adams is a media producer and political writer. She was on the 2004 Bush campaign’s creative team and the 2008 McCain campaign’s ad council. Her writing credits include PJ Media, the Daily Beast, Red State, and the Daily Caller.