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 ep.
John Dingell's a man of steel — literally. The Washington
Post reported Tuesday that Dingell has pins in his ankles and
a steel hip joint. Last Saturday, when Dingell was making his way
through one of those metal detectors at Reagan National Airport,
his steel parts, as well as knee brace, set off the detector. When
he refused a security screener's order to pass his wallet through
the X-ray machine, Dingell was escorted to a temporary office, where
he was forced to pull down his pants, expose his boxer shorts, and
stand upright while a screener waved a metal-detecting wand over
his person.
There are three
important lessons here. First, never come between a congressman
and his wallet. Remember, it's his job to separate you from
your money. Second, congressmen pass laws. They're not expected
to comply with them. That's our job. Third, make sure
you get a warranty for any new body parts. They're not supposed
to trigger alarms.
Anyway, Dingell
was offended by this imposition. After all, he's 75 years old and
noticeably white. He didn't fit the profile (oops, did I say profile?)
of a potentially dangerous air traveler. And unlike his beloved
former president, Dingell's apparently not used to wearing his pants
around his ankles in public places.
When Transportation
Secretary Norm Mineta got wind of this, he called Dingell to apologize.
But if Mineta was to apologize to anyone, it should have been the
unappreciated screener who's undoubtedly still traumatized by the
image of Dingell in boxer shorts.
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