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Bow Down Before Her Mighty Boots


Oprah is God, according to this USA Today report which chronicles the talk show icon’s growth as a spiritual figure.

“She’s a really hip and materialistic Mother Teresa,” says Kathryn Lofton, a professor at Reed College in Portland, Ore., who has written two papers analyzing the religious aspects of Winfrey. “Oprah has emerged as a symbolic figurehead of spirituality.”

First of all, a “hip” and “materialistic” Mother Teresa?  As if the original weren’t those two things in spades.  And second, if Oprah is God, where does that leave Eric Clapton?  Or Tiger Woods?