ACORN: Never heard of it
Arizona: Resembles 1930s Italy
beer summit: Where investigating an apparent break-in is defined as acting “stupidly”
bipartisan: A senator with a 97 percent partisan voting record
Boehner, John: Is to be blamed
bow: Correct greeting for sheiks; for the Queen, an iPod is appropriate
BP: Company requiring a boot on its neck to make it fork over $10 billion, or $15 billion — or why not $20 billion?
campaign finance reform: Applies to “them”
capital-gains taxes: Increase them even if that brings in less revenue (it’s the punishment, stupid)
Chamber of Commerce: Is really to be blamed
Chicago community organizer: Best preparation for the Oval Office
Chrysler creditor: To the back of the line
Churchill: Eccentric 19th-century colonialist
civility: Requires demonizing George W. Bush, while deifying Barack Obama
comprehensive health-care reform: Entails astronomical rises in private health-insurance premiums
comprehensive immigration reform: Blanket amnesty
corpsman: One who carries corpses
Costa del Sol: A cut-rate getaway spot for recession vacationing
cowards: Won’t talk nonstop about race
czar: Agency director subject neither to confirmation hearings nor to audit
divisive: Opposing Barack Obama
doctors: Medical professionals liable to cut off your limbs and rip out your tonsils needlessly for profit
elections: Only sometimes have consequences
enemy: An American who opposes illegal immigration; sometimes mistakenly used of combatants fighting Americans
energy: To be capped and traded rather than produced
exceptional: Old, inaccurate description of the United States
faces: As in “get in their”
filibuster: Archaic and obstructionist parliamentary maneuver except when used to stop reactionary appointments
Fox News: Is really, really to be blamed
George W. Bush: Is really, really, really to be blamed
get out the vote: Dangerous except when applied to minority blocs
golf: Sign of aristocratic disdain that can nevertheless be appropriately used to recharge exhausted liberal batteries
green jobs: Massive subsidies to friendly progressive enterprises
Ground Zero Mosque: No such thing
Guantanamo Bay: Virtually closed
guns: You cling to them, we bring them to a knife fight
“hope and change”: An inspiring slogan that is better than the facts or the truth
ice cream: Eating it will get your children deported
inheritance taxes: Reason to die before 2011
Iraq: Now the good bad war
jobs: Always potentially saved, never actually lost
KSM: Virtually tried and convicted in a New York federal court
Las Vegas: Where enemies of the people go to spend their ill-gotten gains
Latinos: Group of Americans who must punish enemies of the people at the polls
laws: Suggestions that may be followed in cases of social utility
Limbaugh, Rush: Is really, really, really, really to be blamed
“make no mistake about it”: As enlightening as “let me be perfectly clear”
Martha’s Vineyard: Another populist recession-era getaway place
minorities: “They’re counting on your silence. They’re counting on your amnesia. They’re counting on your apathy.”
money: “I do think at a certain point you’ve made enough”
NASA: A social bureau dedicated to Islamic outreach
“never waste a crisis”: Recessions are not so bad after all
outliers: Formerly known as rogue nations
polarization: Rising opposition to liberalism
Predators: Bush started them
progressive: Alternative to liberal, used when the latter polls badly
prolonged detention: Acceptable, as opposed to indeterminate detention
radical Islam: A construct of the paranoid Right
redistributive change: What the Supreme Court needs to work toward
renditions: Ongoing Bush felonies now impossible to stop
Republicans: Cannot sit in the front seat
reset button: Treating our friends as neutrals and our enemies as friends
SEIU: A social-services organization
shovel-ready: Neither ready nor involving shovels
smoking: Does not occur if it occurs in the Rose Garden
stimulus: Borrowing another trillion dollars with no plan for paying it back
tax: Reclaiming public money that was taken by greedy and selfish private citizens
Tea Party: Extremist anti-government types in the incendiary tradition of Jefferson; preferably called “tea-baggers”
terrorism: A man-caused disaster addressed by overseas contingency operations
“they”: Wealthy evil manipulators who use their obscene profits to vacation in places like Las Vegas
times of economic uncertainty: A signal that you are about to be called a racist
tribunals: Bush started those too
$250,000: Above that bad, below good
undisclosed: Description of anonymous opposition campaign contributors
unemployed: Those whose jobs were lost under Bush
Van Jones: Even the name was made up
wealth: To be spread rather than created
white person: Often “typical” and “bitter” with “untrained ears,” and likely to “cling” to religion and guns; in short, full of “antipathy”
working across the aisle: Offering huge earmarks or presidential appointments in return for a single Republican legislative vote
“yes, we can”: Inspiring slogan that went out of use during the summer of 2009
Rush had a good one a few years ago:
bigot - anyone who wins an argument with a liberal
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseThanks for the glossary of Obama terms. I think I need a drink.
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseYou forgot "the Reverend Jeremiah Wright." Oh wait, so did BHO and everybody else.
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseMake this a "Wiki" and we can have fun all day...
Mosque: something that HAS to be built at Ground Zero
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseHere's a few more:
America: an illegitimate country founded on the backs of Natives tribes and African slaves; it became prosperous through ruthless colonialism, aggressive militarism and the naked greediness of its largely unchecked industrial class. Also spelled AmeriKKKa.
American: anyone who, through means legal or illegal (see), enters the otherwise meaningless collection of ZIP codes situated geographically between Mexico and Canada
Civility: bowing to Saudi princes while trashing my predecessor, my country and my fellow Americans on foreign soil
Clock: something that always ticks happy times when I and my party are in power, but that my opponents are dead-set on setting back
Constitution: 1) a synonym for hurdle or obstacle; 2) as in Constitution of the United States, a collection of obsolete ideas from a white, patrician and thankfully dead class of people - largely, of archaeological value.
Controversial: any idea or person diverging from Liberal, ruling-class orthodoxy
Dialog: I lecture you, you listen and nod ('cause I won!)
Domestic job: something that (inexplicably) gets "shipped overseas" after my party raises minimum wages, cowtows to union bosses and trial lawyers, invents new, strangling regulations and increases corporate taxes
Drones: 1) Unmanned planes I use lawfully and humanely to take out foreign undesirables; 2) Unmanned planes my predecessor used unlawfully and inhumanely to butcher innocent men, women and children; 3) my core constituency.
Experience: something I can get from the ground-up, while on the job (but pacing myself and playing lots of golf in between study sessions)
God: a very handsome man I see in the mirror every morning
Hannity, Sean: arch-nemesis du jour (see also Bush, George W.; Limbaugh, Rush; Rove, Karl; et al.)
Illegal: 1) every action performed by my predecessor and his cabinet - and only when performed by my predecessor and his cabinet; 2) any law passed by any state for the purpose of enforcing current law
Islam: centuries-old victim of Christian and Zionist oppression
Islamophobe: 1) anyone diverging from the textbook definition of Islam (see). 2) Anyone denying that thousands of worldwide terrorist attacks conducted by men shouting "Allahu Ahkbar" is just a big coincidence.
Michelle: who you should listen to every time you go to the grocery store (just don't look her below the waist, or you'll turn to salt)
More: what I want when it comes to taxes, regulations, domestic secularization and Islamization, and foreign weakening of America
Profiling: something a typical white person who carries a Bible is statistically certain to engage in
Progress: a REALLY COOL vision of the future I read about while a Sophomore in college
Race relations: 1) see "dialog." 2) Exploiting minorities' rage and sense of entitlement to obtain what I want.
Religion: what you say "Amen" to when a preacher says God D-America and talks about Chickennnnnssss... coming home... to ROOOst.
Terrorist: 1) a white guy driving a pickup truck with a bumper sticker reading "keep honking: I'm reloading"; 2) a member of the US military during my predecessor's term; 3) a misapplied term for an Islamic freedom fighter.
War: can be 1) good, 2) bad or 3) not exist at all. 1) When the enemy is the Republican, the conservative, Fox News or the "typical white person." 2) When national interest is actually at stake. 3) Who 'd you say attacked us on 9/11? Come again?
Wee-wee'd up: 1) how my opponents get when I propose yet another radical way to transform the country; 2) how I'll feel at the end of today when I see the results of the elections.
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseMore Obama Definitions
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseAlly: 1. Anyone who despises and blames America as much as I do (see: leaders of Iran, Cuba, Venezuela, Libya); 2. Anyone I have turned into voters by making them dependent on my largesse to eat, live, and purchase high-tech televisions. 3. Anyone who supports me financially as long as I allow them a license to corrupt,extort, or leach American citizens (see: Teacher, Lawyer, Union, Banker, Chrysler, GM, or Wall Street)
Banker: see: Ally
Chrysler: see Ally
Danger: see: Freedom
Educational Choice: 1. the opportunity each parent has to send his/her child to an institution of my choice. 2. My opportunity to send my children to a different institution than # 1 above. 3. See: Ally
Freedom: see danger
GM: see: Ally
Lawyer: see: Ally
Teacher: Someone who prefers maintaining educational monopolies, unions, and over-extended pension benefits to educating children. (see Educational Choice); 2. see: Ally
Union Member: Someone who prefers maintaining inflated wages, pensions, and lifetime tenure over working, workers, or workplaces; 2. See : Ally.
Van Jones: see: Ally
Wall Street: see: Ally
Wealth: illegally gained asset through the vilest of capitalistic methods: dreaming, hard work and risk
Forgive me for adding these two:
Missile Defense - Unnecessary, expensive, threatening system not needed in a world where Iran, North Korea and nearly every other rogue state is attempting to acquire the bomb and the means to deliver it.
Poland - Stubborn ally with outdated, paranoid security concerns regarding "Reset" Putin's Russia. (Best sold down the river by retracting missile defense {see above} on September 17th....round of golf during their President's funeral service, anyone?)
Rules of Engagement - any actions that hinder US forces operating abroad while simultaneously aiding a foe.
Thanks for letting me vent!
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