Robert:
An ol’ cowpoke went ridin’ out one dark and windy day
Upon a ridge he rested as he went along his way
When all at once he spied a posse from the GOP
A-hangin’ from that ol’ mesquite his fed’ral subsidy
His pen was still a-fire and he knew how to spell “git”
But an ol’ paint can’t outride a trillion-dollar deficit
If only Harry Reid can head ’em off at that there pass
‘Cuz he hasn’t finished paying off creative-writing class
Yipp-ki-o yippi-ki-ay
Cow Poets On The Dole
Yipp-ki-o yippi-ki-ay
Cow Poets On The Dole…
(with apologies to Johnny Cash, Marty Robbins et al)
Mark:
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseYour taxpayer-funded check is in the mail....
And while you're apologizing, don't forget Vaughn Monroe
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseSteyn, you're incredible -- so prodigal with talent so prodigious.
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseGets REALLY funny when you read it while listening to the dramatic Johnny Cash version of the song... The right pauses in the right moments. Nice! First I was like whut? but then I LOL'd...
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseHa-Ha. The joke is on us. Over half the residents of Nevada just voted to reelect this clown. When sizeable numbers of Americans vote to elect unserious people like Harry Reid, then the country is truly broken. Whatever punishment awaits this country, we deserve it.
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseMr. Steyn, you follow no one on Twitter? Really? There's no one interesting enough in the entire Twitter parallel universe for you to take that grand leap of faith and hit the follow button? At all? How am I supposed to become an NRO zombie if you guys won't show me who ought to be putting thoughts in my brain?
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseMark, I love ya, but you just ruined that song (one of my favorites, with or without the Muppets) for me forever. sigh
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseMy Uncle Ed was a real cowboy. He didn't get the whole cowboy poet thing, because it just didn't seem to be that hard of a thing to do. To prove it he wrote a poem in a few minutes on the back of an envelope. It's pretty darn good. You can read it here.
It's *much* better than Steyn's, though not as politically relevant ;)
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseShow-off.
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseI love it! Thanks, I needed a good laugh!
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseAs the orangey sun plopped toward the dusty desert like a bad egg onto a dirty skillet, Cowpoke’s heart grew more achey-breaky than his throbbing purple big toe which his mule Desdemona had squished that morning along with his huevos rancheros, ambling mulishly east-by-northeast and carrying his estranged fiancé, two cases of warm beer and that dreadful notice of no more cowboy poetry subsidies.
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseSambo:
I remember TV commentary crediting Reid's win to a huge turnout of Filipino-Americans (and Reid had brought a Filipino mayor--also a boxer--to Nevada for his campaign).
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseA must-watch for anyone who evokes images of Harry Reid and Cowboys in the same sentence is "Tex The Passive Aggressive Gunslinger." Do yourself a favor and enjoy. And the humor is Steynian
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseMark, you forgot Vaughn Monroe. His version was the first record I ever bought. I put it on a chair after 100 or so listens andmysister sat on it
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseMaybe we can re-dub Harry as "Pay-Cost Bill"??
The Senate as the "O-K-To-Spending Corral"??
And, at the risk of being accused of a violent "tone"...here's hoping the Dem majority in the Senate soon becomes "Tombstone Territory"
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseSteyn is Back!
Joke---it's nice to see your back
especially after seeing tour face.
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseTheir faces gaunt, their eyes were blurred, their Armanis soaked with sweat
They’re spending hard to stimulate, but they ain’t stimulated yet
Cause they would spend forever to fund their favorite cause
Regardless of the deficit, they’d spend without a pause
Yipie i-oh, yipie i-ay! Democrats spending away
As the Democrats were spending, they heard the voters say
If you want to save your country from the hell of spending all the day
Then Harry change your ways today, or into the West you’ll ride
Your future at the Cowboy poetry fest, in old Nevad-i-ay
Yipie i-oh, yipie i-ay! Democrats fading away
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseFor the record, we (here in the sticks,) love cowboy poetry. BUT, we sure as heck hope that any of our favorites would find the need for a Fed subsidy for performance as barf-worthy.
Might be a good qualifying question for booking future acts.
TERRY
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseThey gathered around the fire pit
Some stood some sit
To recite some cowboy poetry
That maybe they had just writ.
Ole Harry tall and gray
Said I got one today
About this here cowboy poetry
And how we can make it pay
No point stoking up a fire
Just so we can all admire
Some cusses shot at poetry
When we can aim so much higher
Fellers this here’s an art
An I think we oughta start
Getting money for our poetry
From them eggheads that pay fer art
Ya’ll know we all pay taxes
So don’t get upset when I axes
For funds for cowboy poetry
Via e-mail, letter and faxes
We’re at least as good as hip hop
And that philharmonic sop
Ain’t no more cultural than our poetry
Just because it’s higher bought
So come on National Foundation for Arts
And send some dollars out to these parts
To fund our cowboy poetry
Send lots, heck haul it out in carts
So Harry that ole coyote
Reply to this commentLinkReport AbuseTold them cowboys that’s whut he wrote
To save your cowboy poetry
And now ya’ll don’t forget to vote