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Magic Moments with the Mutaween

One of the reasons why I’m not in favor of Lindsey Graham–style appeasement is because many of the fellows we’re trying to stay on the right side of are, not to put too fine a point on it, nuts. They’re several suras short of a Koran. And attempting to appease loons is an even more forlorn enterprise than attempting to appease the merely evil. Take, for example, our friends the Saudis. It’s a wealthy and influential nation. These aren’t your illiterate Pushtun goatherds. Look at the picture accompanying this fairly typical news story in today’s Arab News: State-of-the-art office chairs, and a flat-screen TV. And then read the text:

JEDDAH: A total of 30 officials of the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice (Haia) have been trained on how to deal with cases of black magic.

The three-day training program was held in the Eastern Province city of Al-Ahsa.

The commission has achieved remarkable successes in combating black magic in various parts of the country. It has set up nine specialized centers in the main cities to deal with black magicians.

The majority of people arrested for practicing black magic in the Kingdom are Africans and Indonesians.

So most practitioners of black magic are black? Who knew till the Saudi religious police looked into it?

The Riyadh governorate last year launched a campaign against black magicians and those who illegally treat people by reading from the Qur’an.

Only qualified Saudis are allowed to practice Qur’anic treatment methods. Expatriates practicing such treatments would be caught and deported.

Since General Petraeus’s new strategy seems to be to treat the Afghan people by reading from the Qur’an, I wonder if the Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice will be issuing a ruling.

New on The Corner. . .


COMMENTS   15

EXPAND  

THT
   04/05/11 14:55

Didn't Prostratus even say "holy Qur'an"?

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 Dave
   04/05/11 15:11

I got a Black Magic Woman.
I got a Black Magic Woman.
Yes, I got a Black Magic Woman,
She's got me so blind I can't see;
But she's a Black Magic Woman and
she's trying to make a devil out of me.

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   04/05/11 15:17

I wonder how many virtue/vice cops got turned into frogs before this training program? I bet it takes a licensed Qur'an healer to change them back. Who knew a cop's job was so dangerous in Saudi Arabia? A few of those cops look like they've had too many doughnuts, BTW.

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   04/05/11 15:17

One can only hope the grand poobahs in the Promotion of Virtue Prevention (the wording placement of mine is deliberate) Commission don't have dyslexia and read the command as "black musicians."

P.S. Mark, the google ads popping up on the side bar are interesting with this post, and also should be banned by this Commission or Lindsey Graham: "Black Widow Poison Voodoo Specialists" along with rubber bands and curio cabinets.

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Chicounsel
   04/05/11 15:32

I hope to Allah that they are not using any racial profiling in seeking out those who are engaging in black magic out there in the Arabian desert.

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   04/05/11 15:32

@Cartooner - how many were turned into a newt?

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josseffrank
   04/05/11 15:36

Qur'anic treatments and the detection of black magicians are two more examples of Saudi Exceptionalism, which no doubt Obama believes exists. Another is the complete absence of misogynistic jokes about women drivers.

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   04/05/11 15:58

Might you even say "General Betrayus"? Confusion reigns supreme because these guys fail to identify the "enemy".
Appeasement as a strategy is always a mistake. And you can't win the hearts and minds by being a weak toady.

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   04/05/11 16:18

Hey there is some out reach right there: Invite some approved Saudis to practice healing here in the US using the Koran. Make sure it is covered under Obamacare and the Left will give you awards for "bravery."

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   04/05/11 16:20

I just realized something important, we have no Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice. There is a Commission for the Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice gap!

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   04/05/11 23:14

So they are claiming success at preventing black magic attacks? Reminds me of an old beatnik era joke.

The beatnik is standing on a NYC street corner snapping his fingers. One of the straights (e.g. someone who was not hip and cool, not a preference reference) walking by asks him, "What are you doing?"

"Like, man, I'm keeping the tigers away," replies the beatnik.

"There are no tigers around here," says the straight.

"Yeah, man, like, I'm doin' a good job."

I wonder if those cops are snapping their fingers, too?

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So you say
   04/06/11 10:25

Even the blissful & beloved Mark Steyn does not know it all. I don't care if I sound nuts. In this season of saying it, I shall say it. Look. There are weird people who can do weird things (aka magic). If you don't know that, Thank God Almighty for your sheltered life.

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hitnrun
   04/07/11 01:45

@SYS: Even granting that there may be persons with supernatural connections (because I make it a point to grant all presumptions when I can), are they a threat to the Saudi government? Can they be observed or assessed in some way? This is by way of asking: is there anything going on in these hocus-pocus seminars that's likely to be do any good for taxpayers or the hapless citizens caught on the wrong side of the chicken entrails?

Again, this is another contrast between fundamentalist Islam and Everything Else. Christianity, for example, has exorcists. Exorcists study things that most secular, skeptical types would consider nonsense. Yet exorcists' methods do not usually include persecution, arrest, and execution of actual people, and their studies are not funded by the state.

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   07/10/11 01:31

Once you believe in a super-natural something, anything else super-natural becomes a real possibility. See comment below.

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whatsit2u?
   04/07/11 09:56

Why didn't Harry Potter think of that? He could have just read Voldemort the Koran and spared us 7 episodes...

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