The Politics of Romney’s Arboreal Ardor

by Charles C. W. Cooke

Mitt Romney’s odd, much mocked paean to the height of Michigan’s trees turns out to be a rather accurate predictor of his electoral success. According to the Native Tree Society’s list of the tallest trees in the Eastern states, Michigan’s do, in fact, sit right in the middle. Romney is right: It is they, being not too tall and not too short, that form the forest whence Goldilocks came.

Julius Caesar was warned to beware the Ides of March. Perhaps Mitt should beware those states with tall trees? South Carolina, which Romney lost spectacularly, boasts the second tallest average. It is followed by Tennessee (in which Romney trailing in the polls to Santorum), Georgia (Newt’s home state), and Pennsylvania (Santorum’s home state). Meanwhile, the states with trees closest in height to Michigan’s are New Hampshire (which Romney won in a landslide) and Virginia (in which only Romney and Paul are running and Mitt has a 30 point lead).

If Romney does win the nomination, he can kiss goodbye to any (pipe dream) hopes of winning California or Oregon in the general election. Four of the world’s five tallest species stand in those two states.