‘Objects Possibly Related to Search’ for MH370 Found, Says Australian Prime Minister

by Tim Cavanaugh

Prime Minister of Australia Tony Abbott has announced in that nation’s legislature that “objects possibly related to the search” for Malaysian Air Flight 370 have been identified at sea.

Abbott calls the evidence “credible,” adding, “The task of locating these objects will be extremely difficult, and it may turn out that they may not be related.”

CNN, which (cui bono?) has enjoyed a ratings bonanza with its MH370 coverage, provides the above graphic, which indicates the objects were found in the southern Indian Ocean in an area west or west-southwest of Australia. The discovery reportedly came from satellite imagery.

The World’s News Network does not appear to have any news beyond Abbott’s comments and is currently filling the air with bloviation, which per Liebling’s Law is already more voluminous than actual news. Muppetlike CNN correspondent Richard Quest is currently gathering wool about Australia’s proud tradition as a seafaring nation, providing tireless anchormen Don Lemon and Anderson Cooper time to arrive in the studio.

No details about the possible reason for the flight SNAFU, beyond whatever may be implied by the location of the evidence, are available.

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