Golly

by Jonah Goldberg

Someone’s actually been cataloging my monkey references:

Should Cosmo be concerned?

From your Pragmatic G-File:
“Holmes defended free speech on the grounds that more voices in the marketplace of ideas would be more likely to yield a more concrete answer to the central problems of life (think of a billion monkeys banging on typewriters: the more monkeys you add, the more likely it is they’ll write something worthwhile).”

From the G-File you link to in your Pragmatic G-File:
“Just because Bill Clinton always lies doesn’t mean that at some point — like monkeys banging on typewriters — he’ll never stumble on the truth. But in both cases, more than a little skepticism is in order.”

It’s more than just a favorite analogy: You helped make the cheese-eating surrender species famous. There’s the Flying variety to which you’ve referred on many occasions. It was at this point I got curious and Googled NRO:

12/28/99: “‘Well Chuck, there is an outside possibility that mutant computer monkeys will eat your brains and evil hamsters will try to take over the government.’”

Another from ‘99: “Then, when I return to find the Statue of Liberty poking out of Jones Beach, I will be prepared to start society all over again — I will not let Dr. Zeus make a monkey out of me.”

2001: “I can just imagine the Susan Sontag readers of my native Upper West Side on a cultural safari, ‘Oh, look how the Shaman shows the monkey pancreas to the bride before he eats it! That’s to show the demons are gone. Isn’t that marvelous honey?’”

A 2-fer from 10/29/01: “George has been added to our team of web monkeys” and “I don’t want to be hyperbolic, but you should click on these ads like a monkey in a cocaine-addiction study trying to get one last pellet. “

I could go on, but my lunch break’s almost over and the point is made. Admit it: You just like monkeys. Now, back to Pragmatism. (This is clearly the response you had in mind when you wrote it….)

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