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I enter a restaurant, and there, front and center, is Bill Clinton. With Vernon Jordan. Table No. 1. In the course of my lunch, a friend of mine — looking over at the scene — says, “Isn’t that terrible? All those people are coming up to them and interrupting their lunch.”
And I responded, “But, of course, that’s what Clinton wants. Look at where he’s sitting! He could be sitting anywhere — tucked in a corner, very discreet. Anywhere. But he has plopped himself right across from the entrance, where he’s certain to be seen and spoken to. He needs the love, needs the ‘relevance.’ He would have it no other way.” Not a terribly insightful or original spiel, but true. I had arrived about noon, and left about 2 — and Clinton was still there, although with two different mates. Sitting at the table next to them were two of the more prominent conservatives in the city. So, there it is — your New York moment. Not dynamite stuff, but not terrible, either, for a common Friday morning.
Although, in ’96, he did a damn sight better than his running-mate, allegedly more articulate and inspiring than he. I believe that the Gore-Kemp debate was about the lowest forensic moment of our lives — as low as the Cheney-Lieberman debate was high. I recall one abysmal moment in particular. I will paraphrase for you: Gore: I just want to say that, unlike the rest of his party, Jack Kemp is a decent fellow, who, unlike the other Republicans, doesn’t hate blacks and other minorities. Kemp: Thank you, Al. Thank you very much. When Kemp said “Thank you,” some in the audience actually laughed. Maybe they thought he was kidding, being sarcastic. But Kemp continued with, “No, I really mean that” — and he really did. Never have we been so let down, in such a forum. So, at least the Clinton-Dole act on 60 Minutes is not the Clinton-Kemp act. Moreover, the word barrio — Mr. Kemp’s favorite — will be used a lot less. And Clinton and Dole can have those “Senate husband” yuks. How palsy!
Why am I remembering this? Only to retail this: One prominent writer in Washington said, as we were sitting around, “It was the journalistic equivalent of taking off your panties and throwing them at the stage.” I’ve always loved that.
There is just no joking around. The Left — particularly the litigious Left — is simply beyond parody. The stuff published in The Onion, for example, is so true to life, it could just as well be the day’s news. On many days. McDonald’s, you may have noticed, has started to serve bags of sliced apples and grapes at selected locations. That’s fine. But, gosh, do I hate the coercion. No person should have the right to dictate the McDonald’s menu. “Is this America or what?” If one objects to McDonald’s — one can go somewhere else. But what used to be elementary logic — not even worth stating — seems almost daring today.
It was satisfying to see that a Swedish commission has now issued a harsh indictment — against the Swedish state. The commission blamed the country’s foreign ministry for “a palpable lack of interest” in Wallenberg. In Los Angeles, a rabbi with the Simon Wiesenthal Center welcomed the report, saying that the Swedes’ behavior had been “gutless.” No one would confront the Soviet Union, even to inquire into what had been done to a great man. The rabbi elaborated, “The fact [is] that the elite of Sweden never really understood what motivated Raoul Wallenberg or how incredible his achievements were.” It was a disgusting chapter of the Cold War — and it’s of some comfort to know now that certain Swedes are disgusted too.
The reporter said to bin al-Shibh, “They say you are terrorists.” He responded — “calmly,” “serenely” — with, “They are right. That is what we do for a living. If terrorism is to throw terror into the heart of your enemy and the enemy of Allah, then we thank Him, the Most Merciful, the Most Compassionate, for enabling us to be terrorists.” Just to get our terms straight. Mohammed, for his part, referred to 9/11 as “Holy Tuesday” — apparently a common Qaeda designation. And, lest there by any doubt, he said, “Yes, we did it” (“we” being al-Qaeda). Will certain Arabs continue to blame the Jews? Sure — but at least al-Qaeda’s on the record. And “Holy Tuesday” — remember that, lest your resolve start to waver just the tiniest bit.
Thank you.
Some of the most striking portions:
That’s good grace. Have some more:
More:
As I said weeks ago, I don’t know whether I’d’ve done it — Republican loyalty or no Republican loyalty. Hats off to Sheryl Gay Stolberg for an interesting and compassionate piece, and hats off to her editors for publishing it.
With this in mind, I give you the following report from Cuba, one of the darkest states in all the world — and that includes Kim Jong Il’s North Korea:
Count your blessings — among which are that you don’t have to pass “revolutionary preparedness” and are allowed to look apathetic.
Please: Spare me the mail about Pinochet, and how unfair it is to compare him to Castro. This was chiefly a rhetorical point, and I have made it before, too.
Well, I don’t know. I sort of like it — sometimes bluntness and earthiness proves a point, or serves a point. It all depends on context. I especially liked it because it reminded me of George C. Wallace’s “pussyfootin’ around” — as in, “We’ve got to stop pussy-footin’ around over there in Vietnam.” (Once more on the mail point: I don’t need a recitation of the evils of Gov. Wallace. I just liked his language, once in a while.)
Beautifully and indignantly said. Another: “Aloha, Mr. Nordlinger: I had a chuckle reading your column today on the subject of the bilingual treatment of trash. I have recently moved to Hawaii. Upon arrival, one immediately notices that every trash receptacle is labeled ‘MAHALO’ in bold letters. Having grown up in Phoenix, Ariz., and being very familiar with the English/Spanish labeling that is so prevalent there, I immediately assumed that ‘mahalo’ was Hawaiian for ‘basura.’ In fact, it means thank you! “Mahalo for your columns.” And finally, “One more anecdote on the basura/trash topic. In New York City, B.G.E. (Before the Giuliani Era), cars parked on Upper West Side streets at night were frequently broken into by petty thieves intent on stealing the radios, presumably to sell for drug money. One response was for the owner to install a removable radio/tape/CD player, leaving only a vacant hole in the dashboard at night. Nevertheless, many car windows continued to be smashed — apparently it was too dark or the thieves were in too much of a hurry to determine that there was no electronic device installed until the damage was done. Some owners took to posting signs in the windows informing potential thieves that there was no radio — but I distinctly remember many of these signs being limited to the Spanish version: No Hay Radio (‘There’s No Radio’). Liberal inhabitants of the Upper West Side apparently compensated for their ‘ethnic profiling’ of unseen potential thieves by providing language-sensitive signage. Personally, I suspected that the No Hay Radio signs attracted non-thief but deeply insulted bilingual residents.” That is perfect. Absolutely perfect. Have a wonderful, “blest” weekend, y’all. |
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o, you wanna hear a story? Okay. It’s a New York story — it’s
a present-day New York story.
Isn’t that nice that Clinton and Bob Dole are doing a point-counterpoint
thing on 60 Minutes. Nice for Clinton and the Democratic party,
that is. Sen. Dole was never much good at holding up our end, for whatever
reason. Not that there’s not a lot to admire about him. (I was a
Dole intern, I’ll have you know, back when.) It’s just that
he’s not the one you necessarily want as your party or philosophical
spokesman.
