Phi Beta Cons

The Right take on higher education.

A (Facebook) Flip-Flopper


Approximately nine months ago, I wrote perhaps the most vile, hate-filled post in my history as an NRO blogger. My target was Facebook, and I just couldn’t take it anymore:

I can’t take the “discussion groups” that contain such insightful comments as “ROFL.” I can’t take the idea that I’m somehow “maintaining relationships” by reading status updates like, “OMG, I love my kidz!” or “That Derby party was so great!” or “I’m shopping for shoes and just hate the prices!” I also can’t take the positively insufferable idea that Facebookers are somehow changing the world by talking about themselves at great, great length.

Now you could say that I’m just one of those grumpy old guys still cracking the whip on his “horseless carriage” while the rest of the world zooms past on their shiny Model T’s, but not really. I’m actually just checking out of an impossibly dumbed-down world of meaningless information flow and pseudo-discourse where like-minded people build virtual temples to themselves and “LOL” all day about who knows what. I’m not on that bus. Not at all.

Well then. Can I stand behind all that I said and yet sheepishly admit that I’m back? After my post, I felt like a guy who’d yelled “Charge,” stormed the enemy ramparts, and then looked around to see that everyone else was still back in the foxhole playing “Farmville.”

So I waited for others to join my protest. And waited. And waited. Eventually, my desire to be included trumped my sense of pride and individuality, and not only did I rejoin Facebook, I actually spent part of last night thinking up a funny “status update.” Friend me, and you can see it.

But really, it is hard to be an advocate for campus reform and be off Facebook entirely. After all, I couldn’t really help maintain ADF’s campus site, and I might even lose contact with key past clients. At least that’s what I’m telling myself. Mostly I just use my newly reactivated page to engage in hate speech against Duke Basketball. But of course, that’s always justified.

So call me a flip-flopper if you must, but you can’t say anything about me that I don’t already think about myself. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to upload some crazy pics from high school. ROFL!


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