More Miami Madness

by Jason Epstein

Remember this?

Well, now get ready for this:

As Grant Brisbee of Baseball Nation observed diplomatically:

Behold. This is what will happen when the Marlins hit a home run. It’s what Bernie Brewer thinks he’s sliding down after a couple buttons of peyote. Don’t avert your eyes. Look at it. Study it. This is what we’ve become.

If Carnival and Las Vegas had a baby, this would be the placenta. If Charlton Heston ever lands on Planet of the Fish, this will be their version of the “It’s a Small World” ride. This is what would happen if Vikings attacked a Gloria Estefan concert by catapulting flamingos and marlins into the pyrotechnics display.

And no, you can’t make this stuff up. It’s the real deal.