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You Can Take My Vuvuzela From My Cold, Dead Hand

No more discussion, no more debate. If you can’t stand them, turn the sound down. Mexican drums may be banned but those multi-coloured plastic trumpets – loathed by some, adored by others – are here to stay. Nothing has generated more controversy at the World Cup so far than vuvuzelas. Supporters claim they form an integral part of African culture and this is, after all, Africa’s World Cup. Critics respond that they drown out all the usual sounds associated with football – the oohs and aahs, the singing and chanting – and are detrimental to the game. For 24 hours, World Cup CEO Danny Jordaan, the public face of the tournament, had the world thinking we might have seen the last of the horn-like instruments and their constant piercing din resembling an angry swarm of wasps. Jordaan, when asked in an interview if he would get rid of them, answered: “If there are grounds to do so, yes. We did say that if any land on the pitch in anger we will take action.” French skipper Patrice Evra has already blamed the noise generated by the vuvuzelas for his side’s poor showing in their opening group game against Uruguay, which finished goalless.

I had one as a kid, that is, until my father threatened to beat me with it if I blew it one more time. Tough love. - Greg Pollowitz

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