The Telegraph story also casts a light on another topic, school meals, rarely a subject for nostalgia back in the UK. I can still remember those days of liver and bacon, served tepid and gray with a collapsing boiled potato or two for variety and excitement.

Read then these words from a spokesman for local government in Wakefield quoted in the Telegraph:

"Each term we try to come up with a menu which encourages children to think about different issues. This Easter term we chose information technology and did not even consider putting hot cross buns on the menu."

A menu designed to influence children to think about information technology?

Chips with everything, I suppose.

Hot cross buns are a traditional Easter-time treat in England, traditionally served on Good Friday. They are slightly sweet, emblazoned with a cross and best served hot with a little butter. Unfortunately, that pesky cross is worrying some local authorities over in the UK. The Sunday Telegraph is reporting that schools in a number of regions have been ordered not to serve the buns this Easter lest they “offend” children of a non-Christian faith. It’s yet another reminder that 'diversity' means nothing of the sort.

To its credit, the Muslim Council of Britain has called the decision “very, very bizarre”. One of its spokesmen is quoted by the Telegraph as follows:

"This is absolutely amazing. At the moment, British Muslims are very concerned about the upcoming war with Iraq and are hardly going to be taken aback by a hot cross bun…Unfortunately actions like this can only create a backlash and it is not very thoughtful. I wish they would leave us alone. We are quite capable of articulating our own concerns and if we find something offensive, we will say so. We do not need to rely on other people to do it for us…British Muslims have been quite happily eating and digesting hot cross buns for many years and I don't think they are suddenly going to be offended."

Well said.

Here’s a story that could (I thought) only be explained by being dated April 1. It wasn’t – and the Congresswoman should be ashamed of herself.

As to her suggestion that these American dead are not currently buried in “patriotic” soil, Rep. Brown-Waite needs to read these words by Rupert Brooke. Brooke, an English poet who died whilst on active service during World War I, had this to say about the last resting place of a soldier killed overseas. He was writing, of course, about an English soldier rather than an American, but the truth of his words is not confined to any one nationality:

“If I should die, think only this of me:

That there’s some corner of a foreign field

That is for ever England. There shall be

In that rich earth a richer dust concealed;

A dust whom England bore, shaped, made aware,

Gave, once, her flowers to love, her ways to roam,

A body of England’s, breathing English air,

Washed by the rivers, blest by suns of home.”

This Dixie Chicks thing is getting very, very serious for the group. Mind you, I'm not a big one for boycotts; if I threw away CDs of artists whose politics I couldn't stand off my shelf, there'd be very little left to listen to (a reader wrote to say she'd taken her child to hear the great kids' musician Dan Zanes play recently, and he shared his anti-war politics with preschoolers. Asinine!). However, I completely understand country fans wanting to rebuke severely the Dixie Chicks for that disgraceful comment Natalie Maines made on foreign soil. This thing is turning into something huge. Read what reader Dave in Georgia wrote to me this morning:

Here in the Red Zone, the imminent demise of the Dixie Chicks is a topic of
everyday discussion, not just a Internet thing. And every country radio DJ
is being forced to take a stand. I came home yesterday, and my wife asked me if she was supposed to take her CDs to the radio station, or if I knew where she was supposed to mail them. Radio call-ins range for tearful pleas to
pray for the Chicks, to heavily bleeped suggestion for new names for the group.

This thing is turning into a phenomenal case of career suicide. What on earth could Natalie Maines have been thinking, saying such an idiotic thing, given her fan base? Can anybody think of a similar case of a popular performer collapsing professionally virtually overnight because of something he or she said?

The London Independent is reporting that hundreds of members of Mugabe’s youth militia are fleeing to South Africa. Their complaint? They are tired of “killing for nothing”. Mugabe, readers will remember, was recently welcomed to Paris by Jacques Chirac.

Yes, by that same Jacques Chirac, who is (according to Le Figaro) a “a white knight of peace, a champion of all the oppressed of the Earth.”

Great stuff coming in. One clarification: I'm particularly looking for quotes -- the more famous/prominent the better -- which talk about challenging the racial or gender status quo. Blah blah blah

It's late on Friday, but if anybody can help with this I'd appreciate it. I'm looking for hardcore quotes from critial gender, critical race or other post modern types. Specifically, I'm looking for stuff about the need to "smash the dominant gender paradigm" or "transcend the patriarchal white male" blah blah. The more esoteric and impenetrable the academese the better. The only thing is it's got to be real and from a confirmable source. I'll explain all later. Thanks

From a reader:

Dear Jonah,

I just had to relay this story to you it’s absolutely priceless.

I’m relatively new at this company, where I’m pretty much surrounded by lefties – yeah, welcome to Boston – and where the executives make condescending remarks about Bush and the war effort at meetings.

A couple of weeks ago, a co-worker came by my office and saw my copy on dead tree copy of National Review [I read it on the T where I get really strange glances] on my desk and gave me the most horrible look. It fairly screamed: “wow, I never thought you were one of those barbarians?”.

Well, today, I was happily sipping coffee from my newly arrived Cosmo Mug – proudly purchased from the NRO store – and the same person came by. Only this time, instead of sneering, she had a smile on her face and asked “who’s that cute dog?”.

After my initial shock, I replied: “Oh, that’s Cosmo, he’s a famous journalist”. She walked away a bit puzzled – but still smiling as she hadn’t pegged me completely wrong – at least I have good taste in dogs.

I’ve been chuckling about this all day. Friggin priceless.

Saudi Arabia says anyone who thinks there will ever be a Church in his country is a fanatic.

"I stepped down from my leadership position today as a way to demonstrate acceptance of my responsibility for insensitive remarks I recently made."

"I will continue to reach out to the Jewish community and others who were offended by my remarks. And I will work tirelessly for all of my constituents in Northern Virginia, as I have done throughout my 13 years in Congress."

"Most importantly, I will strive to learn from my mistakes and listen to the concerns of my constituents."

Norris: Speaking of multilateralism, do you notice, as many have suggested, that there's an increasing unilateralist bent in the United States government? Blix: Yeah. On big issues like war in Iraq, but in many other issues they simply must be multilateral. There's no other way around. You have the instances like the global warming convention, the Kyoto protocol, when the U.S. went its own way. I regret it. To me the question of the environment is more ominous than that of peace and war. We will have regional conflicts and use of force, but world conflicts I do not believe will happen any longer. But the environment, that is a creeping danger. I'm more worried about global warming than I am of any major military conflict.

Seth Gitell on "Bush's Mideast Misfire."

Admittedly I can't count the emails I don't receive, but so far lots of readers think this smart thing is a lot fishier than appearances and appearances are pretty darn fishy.

A typical email from a reader:

Jonah,

Not only is it peculiar for the mother to invite this homeless bum into her house for work, there are many more strange doins’

The sister waits 2 hours before calling her parents after the abduction

The intruder is able to break into the house and leave with no one noticing.

A 6000 square foot house, but no burglar alarm?

The sister suddenly remembers who she saw/heard – what - 5 months later?

Elizabeth apparently passes up numerous opportunities to escape, call out for help, even on a city street near the police station.

Color me skeptical. I think the 15 year old was much more complicit than an innocent in this whole affair. And the younger sister, too.

And I did not grow up in NYC.

A journalist/Corner reader responds to my "The Palestinian Card" post:

Sure, sure, we all think "Iraq" (I say the word when I'm asked what I'm having for dinner), BUT the Palestinian legislative council is expected to confirm their PM as early as Monday, and senior admin officials who briefed a handful of reporters said they wanted to weigh in before the meeting without appearing to dictate to the Palestinians whom they should pick. They seemed pretty upbeat about the reforms there, and want to keep the incentive structure alive to affect choices by the Palestinians (and the Europeans, who for all their knee-jerk anti-Israel crap have also been pushing for Pal. reforms for some time). So yeah, the announcement is tied to Iraq. But the substance is tied to the events on the ground....

From a reader:

Want to hire a stranger in a giant bunny suit to fix your toilet? I'll gladly dress up in a giant bunny suit (even pink) and fix your toilet for free. It should be noted that I have zero experience working on toilets. If you're worried that I'm some crazed stalker who dresses in giant bunny suits and offers free plumbing work to pundits; fear not, I'm really only offering my services because I'm hoping you'll post this in the corner.

K-Lo, you'd better watch it, or I'll have Julie make her amazing cassoulet, which will further wear down your resistance to all things French. I am pleased to say that my Texas-born bride is a descendant of Claude-Joseph de Lisle Rouget, who wrote the French national anthem. He was actually a monarchist who refused to swear allegiance to the revolutionary regime. History is full of ironies, innit? I've always thought that strictly on artistic terms, the French have the most stirring national anthem. The Star-Spangled Banner will always move me like no other, of course, but the Marseillaise is pretty great. I confess my prejudice comes from repeated viewings of The Grand Illusion and Casablanca, in which the singing of the Marseillaise plays a triumphal, anti-German role in the stories.

And my son loves both President Bush and The Aristocats. His Franco-Texan sensibilities are developing nicely. He freaked out with joy on the phone last week when I told him that President Bush is from Texas. Julie's down in Dallas with him visiting the grandparents, and they took him last weekend to the Alamo, which he knew all about thanks to Bill Bennett's wonderful storybook for kids. Walking into the old fort, he said, apropos of nothing, "I hate the Mexican army." He's three and a half. Julie said his chin trembled and his eyes filled with tears when he stood before the relic case, looking at Jim Bowie's knife. A few months back, when he was obsessed with the Alamo story and demanded to have it read to him over and over, we heard him crying upstairs in bed. Julie ran up to check on him, and came down saying, "He tells me he's afraid he won't remember the Alamo." Now, if kids' music genius Dan Zanes , who makes the best records for children, would come out with a Texas swing version of La Marseillaise, I think the boy would reach nirvana.

This sounds like a whole new strategy for garnering support for war on Iraq. I'm all for a peaceful settlement between Israel and the Palestinians, including a Palestinian state. If rolling out the plan for doing that now makes sense from where Blair and Bush are sitting, so be it. But it's hard to believe the timing has to do with anything but garnering support for invading Iraq. Very interesting to hear what the French say next.

Yesterday, responses to my column were 95% pro, 4% critical but friendly and 1% anti-Semitic bile. Alas, as the column has been sent around the web -- and the mouth breathers have finally finished reading it -- the nasty stuff is coming in. I won't reprint it, but it continues to amaze me the number of people who feel like 6 million Jews was nothing but a good start. I wish I was exaggerating.

I know this is old news to those who followed the Smart case closely from the beginning. But this paragraph from the Washington Post stopped me in my tracks:

The ordeal actually began in November 2001, when Elizabeth's mother, Lois Smart, encountered a long-haired street prophet, in an ankle-length white robe, preaching the words of Jesus on a Salt Lake City sidewalk. She hired the drifter, who called himself Emmanuel, for a day's work repairing the roof of the Smart home.

I'm all for saving some cash, helping a guy down on his luck etc. But who hires a "street prophet" in an ankle length robe to do roof work? These people have young attractive daughters for Pete's sake. Maybe it's my jaded NYC upbringing, but jeez. Why not hire a stranger in a giant bunny suit to fix your toilet? Or maybe hire a naked guy in a trench coat to grout your tub?

actually, it's being replaced by one where george p. bush says that we're gonna attack iraq real soon now. and then, at the end of the commercial, there will be george h.w. bush.
"wait a minute -- *you're* not the president!"
"no, but i was when this started."

That Elizabeth Smart has been found. And I have great sympathy for her family. But I get the sense her father is running for something. He pings my radar in a bad way. I hope I'm wrong.

A UN weapons inspectorhas been killed in Iraq. So far, it sounds like an accident.

Wow. I'm not sure I've ever seen an email response quite like this. In the last twenty minutes or so, I've received some two dozen emails about my PIRG post. Virtually each one begins with some version of "Where have you been?" Or "Dude, this has been going on for a long time" or, most common, "When I was in college...." Apparently this goes on at dozens -- hundreds? -- of schools and has been for decades. I knew the PIRGs played these games but I had no idea it'd been going on for so long and in so many places. Message received.

If YAF or Eagle Forum or Ward Connerly's outfit tried something like this. A college deducts contributions to Naderite groups straight out of your tuition.

The Elizabeth Smart story could be getting even weirder.

Funny, when I was in college that phrase referred to something completely different.

COLUMBIA, Mo. (AP) University of Missouri junior guard Ricky

Clemons has been ordered to stand trial April 29 on charges of assaulting a woman in his apartment.

The trial date was set last week after Clemons, 20, waived formal arraignment. He pleaded innocent last month to a charge of second-degree domestic assault.

Jessica Bunge, 20, of St. Clair, alleged Clemons pushed her down, bloodied her nose and choked her the night of Jan. 16 after she refused to watch the movie "Roots" with him. Clemons was suspended from the basketball team for one game.

Another Nobel Peace Prize winner in our column. Lech Walesa endorses the US's campaign against Iraq. The columns are evening out nicely. Nobel winners against: Nelson Mandela, Jimmy Carter, Desmond Tutu and Yasir Arafat versus Walesa and Eli Weisel. They're still one up, but does Jimmy Carter really count? I mean if Bush were the President of a Third World dictatorship, Carter would be singing his praises.

From CNN:

U.S. officials said Wednesday that surrender negotiations have secretly begun with key Iraqi military officials in hopes that some military units will not fight U.S. and coalition forces if there is war.

The Pentagon is not handling these communications, officials said, but instead other elements of the U.S. government are conducting them.

One senior official said that some parts of the Iraqi military already may have agreed not to fight.

These efforts underscore assessments by the CIA and Defense Intelligence Agency that the leadership around Saddam Hussein is brittle. Officials have been making that view somewhat public as part of an effort to publicize what they say is Saddam's vulnerability.

A friend of mine who's a military ordinance buff, fan of Mack Owens and who works in the defense industry just sent me this IM re Owen's piece on the Mother of All Bombs:

JG, you must stop the presses on the MOAB article. Not to be a nit (though that's exactly what I am being), the Daisy Cutter, and now the MOAB, are not fuel air explosives, as noted by the general media and now Mr. Owens. FAE get their oxidizers from the air; bombs usually provide their own. The Daisy Cutter and the MOAB are NOT FAEs, they are just really, really big bombs.

I have no dog in this fight. I just like the "boom" part.

I've been wanting to write a piece directly on the subject of how containment -- as a moral argument -- is morally offensive for quite a while. Walter Russel Meade does precisely that today in the Washington Post, and brilliantly so. If you want to argue that containment is preferable to war as a national security argument, that's intellectually acceptable. But if you want to make the moral argument that containment is better, you have to demonstrate why more pain and death over a long period is preferable to less pain and death over a short period. And that's a hard argument to make in moral terms.

I'm getting all sorts of nice email from people who attended the debate last night, including from fools who think I lost (just kidding). But this is my favorite so far. Under the subject header "Goldberg Beats Bon Jovi at Wheaton!":

Jonah,

My high school age daughter [name withheld] and I caught your debate at Wheaton last night. Afterwards you were kind enough to sign her "Wimps!!" issue of NRODT. As we were leaving, she turned to me and said, "This is SOOOO cool! My friend [name withheld], she's always bragging about how she went to a Bon Jovi concert and then met the band. But this, this is WAY better!!"

I'm telling you Jonah, you're gonna have to start selling t-shirts. I
can see them now: "Jonah Goldberg World Tour 2003 - Feel the Federalism!".

Thanks for an enjoyable evening, and congratulations on your little one.
Best to Cosmo..."

Ah, Neruda, Ramesh. Here’s a poem by John Kerry’s favorite (a Stalin prizewinner, no less), written on the occasion of Uncle Joe's death:

"To be men! That is the Stalinist law!

…We must learn from Stalin

his sincere intensity

his concrete clarity

…Stalin is the noon,

the maturity of man and the peoples.

Stalinists, Let us bear this title with pride.

…Stalinist workers, clerks, women

take care of this day!

The light has not vanished.

The fire has not disappeared,

There is only the growth of

Light, bread, fire and hope

In Stalin’s invincible time!

…In recent years the dove,

Peace, the wandering persecuted rose,

Found herself on his shoulders

And Stalin, the giant,

Got a slightly peppery e-mail from a Franco-American correspondent, who appreciated the good words I had for the French, but thought I had been wrong not to note that there are plenty of French people who are very conscious of what America did for France in liberating them twice. He says we shouldn't take the actions and views of a minority of Frenchmen for those of the entire nation.

And then he told a great anecdote, about an admirable woman:

One of the most moving things I have EVER seen was my father's 60-something assistant, a wiry, austere, formal French woman, bear down on an American college student who was wearing short-shorts and listening to his boombox in one of the cemeteries in Normandie. She grabbed him by the ear and dragged his face down to one of the crosses and proceeded to explain to him that he owed more respect than that to the 23-year-old who died on a nearby beach to help liberate Western Europe (somehow, this point gets lost) from Nazi domination.

Isn't that great? I got another letter, entirely in French, from a Parisian gentleman. He said the France I love has mostly disappeared, and that his countrymen are a depressed, malcontented people. He doesn't understand Chirac and de Villepin's actions, and complains that the newspapers there are "practically all anti-American. Happily, regular reading of NRO and the Wall Street Journal allow one to stay informed." The gentleman calls The Corner "un bonheur quotidien" (a daily pleasure). Thanks, copain! I won't identify our Parisian confederate by name, for his own protection, but if Rich will spring for plane tickets, I propose that Jonah and I head to Paris and take him up on his generous offer to take us out to dinner.

It's really jumping! Maybe I should leave town more often.

Anyway, the debate went fine I guess. The crowd certainly seemed to like it. Very smart bunch, many conservatives, from all over the area. Lori Wallach is a very smart lady. But we spent much of the night talking past each other. She wouldn't tackle the official debate topic "Does Free Trade Help Poor Countries" in order to beat up the WTO. I wouldn't let her force me to defend the sprawling bureaucracy. I kind of wish we had teams because I am sure a more forceful defense of the WTO could be made by people more comfortable with statistical nitty gritty Wallach got into. My kingdom for a Brink Lindsey! I'll have more details in the AM, but I just thought I should see how things were going here without me.