You don’t get a say.
This week, I’ve seen a lot of people weighing in on John McCain’s announcement that President Trump is not invited to his funeral.
In case you missed it, the news was initially reported by the New York Times:
His intimates have informed the White House that their current plan for his funeral is for Vice President Mike Pence to attend the service to be held in Washington’s National Cathedral but not President Trump, with whom Mr. McCain has had a rocky relationship.
The news created an uproar. Republican senator Orrin Hatch called it “ridiculous,” saying that Trump should definitely be invited. (Note: Hatch has since walked back these comments, saying that he “shouldn’t have said anything.”) It also created a firestorm on Twitter, with people calling Senator McCain a whole host of names — even telling him to speed up the process and die — apparently just to prove their undying devotion to President Trump. Some of the responses were absolutely vile. (Feel free to search Twitter and look for them yourself if you don’t believe me, because I’m not going to give any of these people any exposure by linking to them here.)
Here’s the thing, though: None of these people should be weighing in at all. Even if you weren’t so vile as to, say, call McCain a name in the process, you still shouldn’t be weighing in, because it’s absolutely none of your damn business. Make no mistake: Hatch is 100 percent correct that he shouldn’t have said anything — because no one should have. John McCain’s funeral wishes should be up to absolutely no one but John McCain, and anyone who insists on feeling differently is an arrogant sycophant who needs to shut his or her mouth immediately.
You can disagree with McCain’s Obamacare vote. You can, as I do, disagree with McCain’s foreign-policy views. You can disagree with McCain on absolutely anything politics- or policy-related, but — as my colleague Charlie Cooke so eloquently put it in a tweet — this is absolutely “not a matter of public policy.” In fact, it’s not a matter of public anything. It’s the most private and personal matter that I can possibly think of, and your thoughts on this issue matter so absolutely zero that the only thing that’s conveyed by your giving them is your own disrespect and pompousness.
Like everyone else, I’m going to die someday. When that day comes — assuming I have enough time to prepare for it — I’m going to make my own decisions about who will and will not be at my funeral. I’m going to invite, and not invite, whomever the hell I want. I’m not going to care, or have to care, what anyone else thinks about it, and you can do the same. When it comes to someone else’s, though, you don’t get a say. If you think you do, you’re not only wrong, but you also need to take a step back and consider your view on life. You talk more than you should, you judge more than you should, you get involved in other people’s business more than you should, and you’re much less important than you think you are.