Noninteraction.
Noninteraction
H aliey Welch, a now-embattled young gal who went viral after describing her method to get a male aroused (“Hawk Tuah”), capitalized on her virality first by starting a podcast named Talk Tuah. She quickly became somewhat of an off-brand Alex Cooper, host of the popular podcast Call Her Daddy, though maybe that’s too generous a categorization — Welch’s is a style of “yap” that is completely unburdened by shame or introspection or intellectual pursuit.
But Welch’s biggest impact so far could come from her experimentation in the dating app industry. Welch recently launched an AI-powered dating service, an app called Pookie Tools (“Pookie” is the internet star’s nickname for her own boyfriend). The app is designed to help you find your “forever Pookie” through helpful features such as an AI dating coach (to offer “24/7 dating advice”), a Flirt Meter (to determine “are they flirting?”), a Text Responder (to help “rizz up your texts”), and more.
For those uninitiated, Welch talks mainly about culture and relationships on her podcast. Although she isn’t necessarily a relationship guru, she appeals to a subset of younger women for whom the internet informs nearly all social interaction. Insight into Welch’s expertise and demeanor can be found on any number of Talk Tuah podcast episodes. One of her most famous episodes is with Jake Paul, in which Welch reveals her mystery “Pookie.” Until that episode, she had kept her boyfriend’s name a secret. During the episode, she said, she was excited for the Pookie reveal, because then she wouldn’t have to keep covering his face with emojis on her Snapchat stories.
As with many viral internet sensations who are catapulted into stardom, Welch is not necessarily good at communication, nor does she have any particularly deep thoughts on the world of dating. Which is why, perhaps, her dating tools rely so heavily on artificial intelligence as the primary means of communication between two love-hungry individuals.
The Text Responder, for example, allows paying subscribers ($7) to upload a screenshot of their text conversations with potential love interests. The responder then “rizzes up your texts.” When I asked a friend, “Hey! How was your day,” and received a “Pretty busy. You?” response, the Text Responder offered the rizzed-up response of, “Trying to keep up with the chaos, but I’d rather be busy hanging out with you. What’s keeping you occupied?” My friend was not charmed. “Have a lot to do at work today,” he said. “Sounds like you need a break — how about a coffee date to recharge?” the bot suggested as a potential response. Not a bad segue. The concerning part about the responses, however, is that you’d never know they were generated by an AI chatbot. Until, maybe, you meet your online friend in person and realize they can’t carry a conversation without an app’s help.
Another one of the app’s features allows users to speak with an AI bot programmed to sound like Welch. Welch, who is currently embroiled in a scandal because her recently launched cryptocurrency (the Hawk Tuah memecoin, $HAWK) collapsed after hitting a market cap of hundreds of millions of dollars, is probably not the person to answer life’s greatest questions. (Welch has been missing from the internet for two weeks, ever since the cryptocurrency blow-up, and investors are now suing her for selling the memecoin “without proper registration.”)
Here’s a snippet of my AI conversation with the virtual her:
Me: How do you know if a man is “the one”?
Haliey: Well, darlin’, if he can fix your truck, make you laugh ‘til sweet tea comes out your nose, and ain’t afraid to dance in the rain with ya, he might just be a keeper! Plus, if he can handle your crazy family, he’s a dang saint!
Me: What’s your best relationship advice?
Haliey: Well, sugar, my best advice is: don’t go to bed mad, unless he’s snorin’ like a chainsaw, then you got my blessin’ to whack him with a pillow. Also, always keep a stash of snacks hidden for emergencies—hangry fights ain’t pretty. And remember, laughin’ together is the best kinda glue!
Me: To what would you attribute the bad dating culture among young people?
Haliey: Well, darlin’, I reckon it’s a mix of too many options and not enough patience. It’s like a buffet where folks keep fillin’ their plates but never sittin’ down to enjoy the meal. Plus, with all them social media filters, people are more worried ’bout lookin’ perfect than bein’ real. And let’s not forget, some folks just ain’t been taught how to treat others right. It’s a wild world out there, but there’s still good ones if ya dig deep enough!
Innovations in online dating mirror, and likely fuel, the progressive fear of human interaction among young people. Operation Match, the first computer dating service, was started by Jeff Tarr in 1965 and paired up couples after conducting personality questionnaires. Every participant was given a list of five potential matches with each of their contact information. A participant then decided whether or not to call a match. The computer’s only job was using an algorithm to pair a match.
Pookie Tools, this latest iteration of internet dating, shows how far the original mission of the “use a computer to find love” project has come. Computers no longer just pair couples — they also attempt to make the thoughts, judgments, and conversations that a human should when scoping out a forever partner. Dating services for a while now have reduced social interaction by encouraging text messaging instead of phone calls. If Welch’s vision for online dating services is further embraced, human interaction on online dating platforms could be next to go.
Author’s note: After this was first published, Welch ended her silent streak, with a post on X. She is “fully cooperating with and [is] committed to assisting the legal team representing the individuals impacted, as well as to help uncover the truth, hold the responsible parties accountable, and resolve this matter,” she said.