We defeated fascism — time for Musk to stand trial! Or something like that.
We defeated fascism — time for Musk to stand trial! Or something like that.
A fter the midterm elections, there were many tweets from people rolling up their sleeves and announcing it was time to do the work of the people. Meaning, investigations, lawsuits, jail, drawings and quarterings, heads on pikes — and, of course, taking all of Elon Musk’s businesses away. Boils down to this: Thank goodness we’ve defeated fascism! Now we must use the power of the state to nationalize private industry.
You just don’t know where to start with these people. You want to dress them down in their native tongue, like this:
Srsly? You did a heckin’ racism there. Thanking “goodness” centers Western conceptions of morality as oppositional dichotomies. Are you actually ignorant of the ways in which Manichean duality has been used to otherize indigenous structures that use animism informed by situationally fluid utilitarianism to create new modalities of “right” and “wrong?” Do better! Read a book!
Second, they don’t just want to take Musk’s companies. They also want Musk to stand trial in the Hague. This consummation devoutly to be wished was offered up by Bulwark honcho Jonathan V. Last, who presumably is so hot on preserving conservatism that he wants to hand over an American citizen — an African-American citizen, at that — to a foreign tribunal. Just so you’re keeping score: Deporting illegal Salvadoran murder-rapists to a Salvadoran prison is right up there with the Final Solution. Sending Musk to stand trial for his role in halting the USAID bucket-brigade of taxpayer money to influence foreign elections and fund efforts to combat gender discrimination among Peruvian alpaca herders is Justice.
It’s not going to play well. Aside from Redditors who stamp their sparkly little hooves about the Nerd Reich, most people are impressed by Musk and his companies. Most view him as a weird flavor of Henry Ford, minus the antisemitism, although if he was antisemitic he’d be better regarded by the modern left.
Musk: “We’re putting implants in people’s brains to help the deaf hear and the blind see.” Musk’s enemies: “And how does this help anyone in Gaza? Besides, you are attacking deaf culture. Literally TWO genocides here.”
Musk: “We are building a satellite communication system that brings information and connectivity to the world, bypassing the censorship of authoritarian governments.” Musk’s enemies: “People will use this so-called freedom to spread J. K. Rowling’s tweets that argue against penis-having people working in women’s rape shelters.”
Musk: “We are going to live on Mars.” Musk’s enemies: “We shouldn’t build a shelter on another planet as long as anyone on Earth is homeless, and that includes the deranged man at the park who’s on drugs all the time and smears his poop on the children’s swings. Until he has a safe warm place where he can smear poop on walls he can call his own, humanity shouldn’t go anywhere.”
Musk: “The future of transportation is electric vehicles that don’t need fossil fuels, and whose adoption is a spur to better battery technology.” Musk’s enemies: (crickets) (crickets) (crickets) “We’re taking away your car company.”
All of this might explain why older veterans of midterm elections are not running around with their hair aflame. The left will take this as a Sweeping Mandate and believe they have been empowered to un-Trump the land. Tear down the border wall! Give the Panama Canal to the Chinese! Pallets of cash to Iran! Find a lumpy man in a dress to run the Pentagon!
The overreach will be predictable and familiar. If you’ve been through a few midterm wipeouts, you feel like an immortal vampire in the 17th century watching everyone lose their minds over Halley’s Comet. Dial it back, guys; it’s happened before, and it’ll happen again.
While some people stayed home because they were mad about Iran or high prices or tariffs, the right must remember that the left will not stay home if two years from now their congressional reps have not packed the Supreme Court, admitted Puerto Rico and D.C. as states, and eliminated the Electoral College. They’ll just keep at it. Even if they do get those things and D.C. becomes the 52nd state, they’ll promptly start agitating for Gaza to be the 53rd. Vote accordingly.