Culture

The Corner

Calling Shenanigans on Jake Tapper’s Superman-Haircut Theory

Jake Tapper has a fantastic tweet thread on how Superman cuts his hair.

One of Superman’s tried and true methods, apparently, is that he uses his own laser vision to burn back his hair. I didn’t know this because — confessing my unpopular opinion here — I always thought Superman was kind of a dumb superhero and so I rarely read the comic.

Still I call shenanigans on this.

A quick Google search reveals, much as I expected, that Superman has flown into the sun many times.

There’s even video:

And yet I’ve been looking in vain for a single image of Superman with his hair burned off. Now, you might say that of course he won’t lose his hair in our “yellow” sun, because he derives his powers from it. When he goes into our sun, he gets stronger and so does his hair.

But according to Wikipedia and some more googling, Superman has also been able to withstand the heat inside the Earth’s core which, according to NASA, could range as much as 7,000 to 12,000 degrees. That is hotter than the surface of the sun and presumably hotter than his heat vision. And yet, he emerges with that glorious just-showered look.

Obviously, the truth is that Superman wears a wig. Either that, or Superman is a ridiculous comic-book character. Take your pick.

Most Popular

U.S.

The Gun-Control Debate Could Break America

Last night, the nation witnessed what looked a lot like an extended version of the famous “two minutes hate” from George Orwell’s novel 1984. During a CNN town hall on gun control, a furious crowd of Americans jeered at two conservatives, Marco Rubio and Dana Loesch, who stood in defense of the Second ... Read More
Religion

Billy Graham: Neither Prophet nor Theologian

Asked in 1972 if he believed in miracles, Billy Graham answered: Yes, Jesus performed some and there are many "miracles around us today, including television and airplanes." Graham was no theologian. Neither was he a prophet. Jesus said "a prophet hath no honor in his own country." Prophets take adversarial ... Read More
Film & TV

Why We Can’t Have Wakanda

SPOILERS AHEAD Black Panther is a really good movie that lives up to the hype in just about every way. Surely someone at Marvel Studios had an early doubt, reading the script and thinking: “Wait, we’re going to have hundreds of African warriors in brightly colored tribal garb, using ancient weapons, ... Read More
Law & the Courts

Obstruction Confusions

In his Lawfare critique of one of my several columns about the purported obstruction case against President Trump, Gabriel Schoenfeld loses me — as I suspect he will lose others — when he says of himself, “I do not think I am Trump-deranged.” Gabe graciously expresses fondness for me, and the feeling is ... Read More