In Memoriam

Britain’s Poet Laureate, the ineffable E.J. Thribb, has produced some memorial verses.


Farewell then

Osama bin Laden.

Your death

Sends a lesson

To evildoers everywhere.

So here

(I think)

Is the lesson:

Do bad stuff to us

And you can be certain

We shall not rest

Until we’ve lost

Thousands of guys;


Trillions of dollars;

Patted down


And their grannies;

And made

Everyone take off his shoes,

And allowed you,

Mr bin Laden

(Or is it just

Mr Laden?

I’ve never been sure

And now I guess

It doesn’t matter)

Absolutely no more

Than ten years’ living

In a luxury flat —

Protected by

The military of

Our key ally.

And now

I’ll never know

If you moussed your beard

Like Keith’s Mum says.

    — E.J. Thribb (17½)

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