‘Finally, in Jack Conway, we have a candidate who is willing to stand up to the menace of Aquabuddhists.’

In this morning’s Jolt, you can see Jack Conway has rapidly become one of my very least favorite candidates this cycle.

Finally, a Candidate Who Will Drive the Aquabuddhists Out of America

Mason Dixon offers their first poll of Kentucky, and so we can’t compare this to a previous one by the firm to get a sense of the trend. But the 5-point lead they see seems rather modest compared to polls in August and September, when Rand Paul often led by double digits.

And the Lexington Herald-Leader thinks that the modest lead might just be a result of that infamous ad that made many Democrats cringe: “The number of undecided voters could reflect uncertainty about a TV ad Conway launched last weekend regarding Paul’s behavior in the 1980s as a member of a secret society at Baylor University called the NoZe Brotherhood, said University of Louisville political science professor Jasmine Farrier. The ad, which has gotten mixed reaction from many Democrats, raised questions about Paul’s religious beliefs and referred to an anonymous woman who alleged Paul tied her up and forced her to worship a god called ‘Aqua Buddha.’ Paul, a Bowling Green eye surgeon making his first bid for public office, has said the accusations are ‘all lies’ and ‘completely untrue.’ The anonymous woman, who has been quoted by The Washington Post and GQ magazine, has disputed Paul’s assertion.”

One of the disturbing trends in modern politics is how some figures can vehemently deny doing something while they’re still doing it. (I think I blame the audacity of “I did not have sexual relations with that woman.”) Jack Conway’s defense, when local media asked him about the fallout of the ad was, “When asked about any fallout from Sunday’s debate or the recent attack ad about Rand Paul’s college days, Conway says he’s not questioning Paul’s faith.”

The ad text, once again:

Mr. CONWAY: I’m Jack Conway. I approve this message.

Narrator: Why was Rand Paul a member of a secret society that called the Holy Bible a hoax that was banned for mocking Christianity and Christ? Why did Rand Paul once tie a woman up, tell her to bow down before a false idol and say his god was Aqua Buddha? Why does Rand Paul now want to end all federal faith-based initiatives, and even end the deduction for religious charities? Why are there so many questions about Rand Paul?

The whole ad is asking questions about Paul’s faith, and then Conway has the stones to add, “In the days remaining he wants to focus on the issues, especially jobs.”

And then the earth opened up, the Devil himself popped out of the crevice, saluted Conway for his brazen style, and carried him away. Okay, not really, but that’s what should have happened.

Well, presuming the ad is in part responsible for the narrower margin, we can thank the people of Kentucky for providing all of us a valuable lesson. Unsubstantiated charges and attacks on an opponent’s religion — particularly the suggestion that he’s not a real Christian, or that his true faith is strange or alien or perhaps some sort of pagan blasphemy — always work.  And thank goodness for us, huh? Finally, in Jack Conway, we have a candidate who is willing to stand up to the menace of Aquabuddhists. If there’s anything American stands for, it’s looking at strange, perhaps entirely fictitious religions and declaring their practitioners unfit for public office. Isolating and demonizing people of different religious beliefs has a long and proud history from Armenia to the Balkans to Constantinople. If Jack Conway is this tough on Aquabuddhists, imagine how tough he’ll be on Mormons.

I hope you’re proud, Democrats. Way to go.

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