Already our more creatively conspiratorial readers are at work; from an e-mail on the World Cup:
Just tell people Karl Rove put the soccer team together so that it’s impossible to be competitive. You see, the Americans actually lead the world in soccer players, but we’re held in such low regard overseas, Rove made the decision not to make matters worse by playing our stars. And we’ve actually got sleeper CIA funded soccer players on the Mexican team, hence their big win over Iran.