The Corner

Best Arnold Movies

The case for Raw Deal:

[It]Has the greatest line he ever delivered. After his drunk wife throws

her birthday cake at him, narrowly missing his head and instead hitting

the wall, Arnold says: (wait for it) “You should not drink and bake.”

A case for Conan:

Jonah, If any one says anything other then Conan they are simply not thinking straight! Mongol General: Hao! Dai ye! We won again! This is good, but what is best in life?

Mongol: The open steppe, fleet horse, falcons at your wrist, and the wind in your hair.

Mongol General: Wrong! Conan! What is best in life?

Conan: To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women.

Mongol General: That is good! That is good. And what a cast! Arnold, Max von Sydow, the great James Earl Jones! …if you don’t like Conan the Barbarian you must be a communist 😉

A point for Hercules:

How could the Hercules movie that he did not come in at #1. All of his lines were dubbed! Truly a classic.

Update: Another case for Hercules:

Nothing could ever compare to the awesome badness of his first movie, Hercules in New York. Someone thought that his accent was too strong, so his voice is overdubbed with an obnoxious American voice. Add to that an unbelievably stupid plot, and it’s just hilariously bad. (Apparently someone went back later and restored Arnold’s real voice, but you can hear the overdub here. Scroll to about 1:40).

Update II: The case for Running Man:

Please, it’s The Running Man!   Perfect pulp short story to make into a action movie.  Funny!  Arnold at his drollest and most Austrian!   Richard Dawson asking for a big kiss, but no tongue!    It’s even got Jim Freaking Brown, for crissakes!  And not one but TWO future ineffective Governors! 

Jonah Goldberg — Jonah Goldberg holds the Asness Chair in Applied Liberty at the American Enterprise Institute and is a senior editor of National Review. His new book, The Suicide of The West, is on sale now.

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