The Corner

Britney’s Wedding

Reading about the Britney Spears wedding fiasco in America’s Newspaper of

Record this morning (I mean, of course, the New York Post), it occurred to me that

the root cause of this sad affair may be nothing deeper than gross

stupidity. Reading of what happened, and the recorded comments of Britney

and her husband-for-a-day, Jason Allen Alexander, it is hard to avoid the

impression that they do not possess more than half a brain between the two

of them. Jason: “We had just got through watching ‘The Texas Chain Saw

Massacre’. We were just chilling in the room about 3:30 am, and we had so

much fun just looking out at the city and the lights.” So… they went and

got married. For 55 hours. Why mince words here? What we are dealing with

is a couple of morons. These are not even air-heads–I doubt the density of

matter inside their skulls rises to the level of the interstellar vacuum.

If Hollywood’s planning another remake of DUMB AND DUMBER (which would take

a lot of nerve, considering the pig’s ear they produced with the last

remake), I have a couple of suggestions for the casting director.