The Corner


Remember that courtroom scene in Big Daddy where everybody gets choked up about their fathers? Well, my email box is a bit like that today. I’m not being dismissive. It’s all very moving. Thanks for all the nice notes. Here are a few:


I’m sure you’ll hear from lots of folks, who, like me, also miss their dads. I got thosefloods of emotion for about three years after he died and even now (ten years later) sometimes.

My major professor told me after his wife died: “You don’t get over it; you just get used to it.” I think that’s right. I also think that being a father makes you miss your own. Knowing how much you love your little one, you realize how much you were loved. That recognition is enough to break any man’s heart.

Happy Father’s Day to you.


Thanks for the post “Remembering Papa G”. My father passed away almost 13

years ago when I was 27 and not a day goes by that I don’t think about him,

usually a memory that brings a smile to my face. But you are right: every

now then, just out of the blue, something triggers overwhelming emotions.

Just the other day I was playing with my youngest (20 months), when I

teared up thinking, “man, I wish my father could see him”. As am I right

now writing this.


[Name withheld]

P.S. I bet that’s the fourth time I’ve read “The Hop Bird”. Your father

must have been a wonderful man.



It will be 11 years in August since I lost my dad.

The emotions you describe do seem to come out of nowhere sometimes and you are never prepared. Indeed grief never goes away.

Thanks for sharing

[Name withheld]


Hi Jonah, Nice post about your father. I can relate, the grief goes away but the emotions don’t and I hope they never will. Mine comes every year for the Auburn/Bama game. Dad was a Tiger and it was the last thing we did together, 30 years ago.



I’m a regular reader of NRO, but only very rarely send my thoughts in. But your post on dealing with the loss of your father and the flood of grief really hit home with me.

I’m a 39 year old regular guy with 2 wonderful kids, 7 and 4. I have a better life than most and definitely appreciate that. However, in November 2005, I lost my beautiful wife of 9 years to a brutal bout with lung cancer (non-smoker, btw). In July ’05, the world was terrific. The day after Thanksgiving, she was gone.

We’ve gone on, as we all must when faced with such situations.

But your expression of how the emotions surge was spot on. My own description is that there is an underground river raging below the surface of everyday life. After a while, you feel like you have “dealt” with your grief. Maybe even a spot of guilt over being “better”. Then, an event, a song, an old card, something, triggers it. And WHAM, it can knock you to your knees.

Time does help, but I’ve come to understand it does not “heal”. You will always grieve the loss of your father as I do my wife. But you learn to give yourself outlets. As difficult as Father’s Day is for you, it is a chance to step back, take in the grief, feel the underlying emotions, and process it in a healthy manner. For me, it’s Mother’s Day (especially with the impact on the kids) and our wedding anniversary.

Anyway, as I said, you post touched me, so I wanted to tell you that. No two losses, no two grieving processes are the same, but there is definitely a shared experience in many ways.

My best to you this weekend and always,

[Name withheld]

Ps: Btw, I’m fortunate enough to be dating a wonderful woman now – something I honestly did not think would be possible not so long ago. But that does not circumvent the process either.

Jonah Goldberg, a senior editor of National Review and the author of Suicide of the West, holds the Asness Chair in Applied Liberty at the American Enterprise Institute.

Most Popular

Politics & Policy

The Sinking Collusion Ship

The entire Trump-Russia collusion narrative was always implausible. One, the Washington swamp of fixers such as Paul Manafort and John and Tony Podesta was mostly bipartisan and predated Trump. Two, the Trump administration’s Russia policies were far tougher on Vladimir Putin than were those of Barack ... Read More
Politics & Policy

The Problem with Certainty

EDITOR’S NOTE: The following is Jonah Goldberg’s weekly “news”letter, the G-File. Subscribe here to get the G-File delivered to your inbox on Fridays. Dear Reader (Including those of you having this read to you while you white-knuckle the steering wheel trying to get to wherever you’re going for the ... Read More
Politics & Policy

The Worst Cover-Up of All Time

President Donald Trump may be guilty of many things, but a cover-up in the Mueller probe isn’t one of them. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, attempting to appease forces in the Democratic party eager for impeachment, is accusing him of one, with all the familiar Watergate connotations. The charge is strange, ... Read More

Theresa May: A Political Obituary

On Friday, Theresa May, perhaps the worst Conservative prime minister in recent history, announced her resignation outside of number 10 Downing Street. She will step down effective June 7. “I have done my best,” she insisted. “I have done everything I can. . . . I believe it was right to persevere even ... Read More
PC Culture

TV Before PC

Affixing one’s glance to the rear-view mirror is usually as ill-advised as staring at one’s own reflection. Still, what a delight it was on Wednesday to see a fresh rendition of “Those Were the Days,” from All in the Family, a show I haven’t watched for nearly 40 years. This time it was Woody Harrelson ... Read More
Politics & Policy

The Democrats’ Other Class War

There is a class war going on inside the Democratic party. Consider these two cris de couer: Writing in the New York Times under the headline “America’s Cities Are Unlivable — Blame Wealthy Liberals,” Farhad Manjoo argues that rich progressives have, through their political domination of cities such as ... Read More

The Deepfake of Nancy Pelosi

You’ve almost made it to a three-day weekend! Making the click-through worthwhile: A quick note about how National Review needs your help, concerns about “deepfakes” of Nancy Pelosi, one of the most cringe-inducing radio interviews of all time, some news about where to find me and the book in the near ... Read More

America’s Best Defense Against Socialism

The United States of America has flummoxed socialists since the nineteenth century. Marx himself couldn’t quite understand why the most advanced economy in the world stubbornly refused to transition to socialism. Marxist theory predicts the immiseration of the proletariat and subsequent revolution from below. ... Read More