The Corner

Do Vampires Have Rights?

Jon Schaff asks, Do Vampires Have Rights?

I don’t have time to dwell on this (I have a column deadline and I’m leaving to tape Glenn Beck soonish). But it seems to me that the founding fathers would unequivocally say that vampires do not have rights because rights come from God (or our creator). Vampires are undead and exist solely thanks to satanic or other demonic forces. They shy from God and God’s love and therefore do not deserve the protections all of God’s creatures are entitled to.

Now, the interesting question would be, do atheists think vampires have rights? I think I’m safe assuming that most atheists ground their understanding of rights and citizenship as stemming from sentience, consciousness, etc. Well, vampires have all of those things in their favor. Presumably, an atheist would reject the premise of the question. They would argue that vampires either do not exist at all (strong case there) or that vampirism is a biological state, a disease of some kind (backed up by many sci-fi portrayals of vampires). In which case, I assume they would argue that vampires do have rights because having a disease does not amount to a surrender of your humanity or rights.

Interestingly, if you could prove that vampires are real and that their vampiric status derives from supernatural forces, you would have done yeoman work in proving the existence of God. After all, if there are demons, there are probably devils and if there are devils, it seems awfully silly to reject the idea that there might be angels and, ultimately God. If I were more up to speed on my Chesterton, I’m sure there’s an appropriate quote here, but I can’t think of it. 

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