John:
I think Cole Porter is just the ticket.
All sorts of Cole Porter lyrics are
appropriate. For example:
—”Always True to You in My Fashion” (Next time the feds question your
veracity.)
—”Anything Goes” (For sticky questions about insider trading.)
—”Away from it all” (Yep, that’s where you’re going.)
—”Cherry Pies Ought to Be You” (That is, they ought to be MADE by you,
Martha.)
—”Dainty, Quainty Me” (Yes! We love you, Martha!)
—”Don’t Let It Get You Down” (Really, honey–you’ll come back!)
—”Ev’ry Day a Holiday” (Let’s face it, there isn’t THAT much to do in the
pokey.)
—”Fascinating Females” (No! Just keep to yourself and do the time!)
—”Five Hundred Million” (How much your stock lost this week.)
Etc. etc. etc.