The Seventh Seal has been broken, the vampire with a soul is playing a role in the apocalypse, the one-armed man has been caught, Kwai Chang Caine has snatched the stone from Master Po’s hand, Cthulhu has awakened, Alec Baldwin has become talented, American Freedom is made in China, and — gird thy loins — a Republican is poised to take Ted Kennedy’s seat.
But none of that is important right now.
Except that — and I almost forgot — the New Goldberg File has returned.
While all the attention is on The Morning Jolt, what with its fancy-pants substantive content and all, you may have noticed that the sign up for the new Goldberg File is now up and running as well. The sample issue was written under duress. Jack Fowler was standing there like Kris Kristofferson in Payback making threats about what parts of my anatomy he was going to feed me next, while Chris McEvoy pancaked my toes with a hammer. But don’t let my suffering stand in the way of your enjoyment.
Sign up now. You know what they say, every time a reader signs up for my newsletter, an angel gets its wings, but Goldberg doesn’t make a dime.