The Corner

Putting The Hurt On The Ukraine

It’s funny, I was saying almost the exact same thing to my wife this morning. But I was too lazy to look up the transcript. From a reader:

Amidst all the turmoil in the Ukraine, I expected at least one person in the Corner to mention that nation’s last foray into mainstream culture. In the great Risk episode of Seinfeld, Kramer is battling away destroying Newman’s armies. While riding the subway, the following scene takes place:

Newman: I’m not beaten yet. I still have armies in the

Ukraine.

This comment perks up the ears of what appears to be a Russian immigrant.

Kramer: Ha ha, the Ukraine. Do you know what the Ukraine is? It’s a sitting duck. A road apple, Newman. The Ukraine is weak. It’s feeble. I think it’s time to put the hurt on the Ukraine.

Ukrainian: I come from Ukraine. You not say Ukraine weak.

Kramer: Yeah, well we’re playing a game here, pal.

Ukrainian: Ukraine is game to you?! Howbout I take your little board and smash it!!

The Ukrainian pounds the game board, destroying it and sending army pieces flying.

I think this episode should be front and center in the formulation of US policy during the current crisis.

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