The Corner

Re; Mars, Venus

A reader in Michigan: “As to your shirt, we had a guest teacher from Wales

one year. I was a freshman (so you can understand how entertaining this

was) and he taught Biology and always wore the SAME OUTFIT. White shirt

button down with brown pants and… he wore a tank-style undershirt! Must

be something about you guys from across the big pond. … Is it something

about growing up across the Atlantic?… And… do you wear an undershirt???

As to the female hominid… we realize how dorky you look when you wear the

same clothes, and always wonder if it’s the EXACT same clothes, or if you

have many different pieces of the same thing. And if you wonder if it’s the

same thing… then you’re really wondering about people’s cleanliness and

stinkiness, etc. and we would rather not have someone wonder about that.

It’s been thought about, but we’ve evolved far more than the male hominid.”

Now look here. (1) I do not take kindly to being compared with a person

from Wales. The Welsh eat seaweed, speak a language no-one else can

understand, and sing far too much. “Taffy was a Welshman, Taffy was a

thief,” etc., etc. (2) I have ***SEVERAL*** blue shirts, not just one. (3)

Under my shirt I wear a “tank-style” undershirt in the summer (the style

known in NYC as a “guinea T-shirt,” and elsewhere, I believe, as a

“wife-beater”). In the winter I wear an actual plain white T-shirt under my

shirt, and I have ***SEVERAL*** of those, too–I buy them five at a time

from Sears. (4) I shower every morning, except when I forget to, and am

fragrant as honeysuckle. Okay?

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