The real reason I’m in London is that I’ve sworn a blood oath to track down all of the Nigerian Oil Ministry and Other Third World Bank fraud emails I get every day. So far I’ve managed to stay out of the tabloids as I go from gritty internet cafe to gritty internet cafe thrashing sketchy dudes in Kente cloth and funny hats who begin all of their emails with anything like: “Dear Kindest Sir, You may be surprised I am contacting you this way. I received your name through a mutual friend in the diamond/oil/gas industry. I wish to transfer to you US$14,000,000….”
It can get awkward reading over their shoulders until I’m sure it’s them.