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Seven Customer Care Representatives A-leaping

Following my post yesterday on’s bizarre “Twelve Days Of Holiday” campaign, an unseasonably intemperate reader wrote:

Don’t like Amazon? Don’t shop at it then, you clot. Nobody really gives a damn if some online retailer is insufficiently Christian for your tastes. Nobody.

Oh, I don’t know. The “Twelve Days Of Holiday” promotion has now been amended to “The Twelve Days Of [click here for offensive C-word]“. So, if I’m a clot, I’m Rudolph the Red-Nosed Clot in whose wake you run-of-the-sleigh clots follow.

To be honest, I mildly regret this instant corporate capitulation as sometime Cornerite Michael Graham has started up a poll to find out your favorite “Twelve Days Of Holiday” song. As I write, the runaway winner is ”It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Thursday”.

[UPDATE: Things are going from bad to Norse:

Some may find it offensive to officially promote the Norse gods, so I believe it would be best to quit using terminology such as “Tuesday”, “Wednesday”, “Thursday” and “Friday” for our weekdays.  Clearly, “It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Thursday” is highly offensive to those who do not worship Thor, and thus a more appropriate holiday song should be “It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like The Fifth Day of the Week”.

But only if you assume the week begins on Sunday, as so many C-word obsessives do. Another reader writes:

Surely we should avoid offending those who do not worship Thor, god of thunder. So it should be “It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like the 4th day of the week”.

How about “It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Lunchtime”?

Mark Steyn is an international bestselling author, a Top 41 recording artist, and a leading Canadian human-rights activist.


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Language, of course, is generally employed by human beings to distract or deceive. So there is much to be said for critical listening.