Following my post yesterday on Amazon.com’s bizarre “Twelve Days Of Holiday” campaign, an unseasonably intemperate reader wrote:
Don’t like Amazon? Don’t shop at it then, you clot. Nobody really gives a damn if some online retailer is insufficiently Christian for your tastes. Nobody.
Oh, I don’t know. The “Twelve Days Of Holiday” promotion has now been amended to “The Twelve Days Of [click here for offensive C-word]“. So, if I’m a clot, I’m Rudolph the Red-Nosed Clot in whose wake you run-of-the-sleigh clots follow.
To be honest, I mildly regret this instant corporate capitulation as sometime Cornerite Michael Graham has started up a poll to find out your favorite “Twelve Days Of Holiday” song. As I write, the runaway winner is ”It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Thursday”.
[UPDATE: Things are going from bad to Norse:
Some may find it offensive to officially promote the Norse gods, so I believe it would be best to quit using terminology such as “Tuesday”, “Wednesday”, “Thursday” and “Friday” for our weekdays. Clearly, “It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Thursday” is highly offensive to those who do not worship Thor, and thus a more appropriate holiday song should be “It’s Beginning to Look A Lot Like The Fifth Day of the Week”.
But only if you assume the week begins on Sunday, as so many C-word obsessives do. Another reader writes:
Surely we should avoid offending those who do not worship Thor, god of thunder. So it should be “It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like the 4th day of the week”.
How about “It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Lunchtime”?