Husband (feeling mighty virtuous about have started some long-postponed painting work around the house; wearing a head-to-toe white painter’s coverall ): Hi Honey.
Wife (just come in from shopping, stares): What on earth are you wearing?
Husband: Painting suit. Protects my clothes. Got it from Home Depot.
Wife: Where’s the tail?
Husband: Tail? What tail? What are you talking about?
Wife: You look like a sperm.