If The 14 Fists of McCluskey — where Rick Dalton (Leonardo DiCaprio) delivers justice in the form of “fried sauerkraut” to a pack of sniveling Nazis — existed outside of Quentin Tarantino’s cinematic universe, it would look a lot like Guy Ritchie’s latest offering. The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare marks the triumphant return of the English director’s roguish, vintage flair, making it, alongside The Beekeeper, this year’s most entertaining action flick.
Based on a true story (sort of), the fictionalized account of Operation Postmaster opens in 1942. Against the backdrop of a Morricone-esque score, we meet British special agent Gus March-Phillips (Henry Cavill at his best) and Danish officer Anders Lassen (a brawny Alan Ritchson who steals the show) posing as Swedish fishermen on a perilous mission through Nazi-infested waters off the African coast.
Unbeknownst to the Kriegsmarine crew preparing to inspect their vessel, they are about to be sent on a one-way trip to hell. March-Phillips, Lassen, and their men unleash a delicious onslaught of fire and fury on the fascistic weasels that is reminiscent of Franco Nero’s iconic takedown of the Red Shirts in Django. With guitars strumming in the background, they transform the Nazis into human colanders. Ritchie’s direction is confident and restrained — the violence is exquisitely visceral but never crosses into gore.
Following this explosive opening, the film rewinds a few weeks back to British officials briefing Prime Minister Winston Churchill (Rory Kinnear) on the Luftwaffe’s ferocious aerial bombardment. With Old Blighty on the brink and options dwindling — including the unthinkable surrender to Hitler — a moment of pure movie magic unfolds.
Brigadier Gubbins, known simply as “M” (Cary Elwes being, well, Cary Elwes), and his aide, naval lieutenant and future James Bond author Ian Fleming (Freddie Fox), propose an audacious solution (Fleming’s boss and the daring exploits of March-Phillips and his men were among his inspirations for the iconic spy series). The duo advise the indomitable British Bulldog to form a clandestine unit to sabotage the Germans’ U-boat resupply operations in Spanish-controlled Fernando Po. The stakes couldn’t be higher — if they get caught, Parliament will demand Churchill’s head, with dire consequences for the nation and the world. Fully aware of the risks, the PM greenlights the covert mission.
The decision to prominently feature Churchill in the film is a bold move. Portraying familiar historical figures is always tricky because audiences have preconceptions about their appearances and mannerisms. Here, Ritchie might have benefited from giving him less screen time (mirroring Tarantino’s own treatment of Churchill in Inglourious Basterds), affording audiences more opportunities to savor the quirkiness of Elwes and his sidekick. But this is a relatively minor concern in a kinetic action-comedy that puts the strengths of its talented director on full display.
After the initial act, The Ministry mostly splits into parallel narratives. On one track, Marjorie Stewart (Eiza González) and Frederich Heron (Babs Olusanmokun) lead an intelligence unit whose first mission is to infiltrate a train teeming with German officers to spy on the Nazis’ war plans. Though the pair don’t always gel perfectly on-screen, they still pull off one of the film’s most suspenseful moments when Stewart’s cover is nearly blown.
Meanwhile, M tasks maverick March-Phillips with assembling a ground team to demolish an Italian supply ship and its accompanying trolleys on Fernando Po. The crew have great chemistry as their mission veers off course when they learn that Geoffrey Appleyard (Alex Pettyfer), whom M sent in advance, has been captured by Gestapo agents. The news prompts the men to stop at a Nazi hub in the Canary Islands for a daring rescue mission.
In a sequence that would have made Sam Peckinpah blush, March-Phillips, Lassen, and their men single-handedly annihilate over 100 Nazis to liberate their comrade. It’s like giving the boys from The Wild Bunch, armed with everything from machine guns to bows and arrows, carte blanche to wreak havoc upon the Third Reich — chef’s kiss.
As Ritchie fans know, the filmmaker excels at pulverizing bad guys while serving up a cinephile’s treasure trove of cultural references. The Ministry, however, would have benefited from building up its chief villain, Heinrich Luhr (Til Schweiger), a little more. Sure, he’s a stinkin’ Nazi, but a deeper dive into his depravity could have intensified the film’s emotional impact.
The movie compensates for character development with its brisk pacing and seductive aesthetic, with nods to classics like Casablanca and Ritchie’s nostalgia for the Bond franchise. The director’s élan shines brightest as González channels Jessica Rabbit in a sultry rendition of “Mack the Knife” that is seamlessly interwoven with cuts to the chaos that Cavill and his posse are unleashing outside. The result is a pulse-racing mash-up that is as sexy as it is exhilarating.
Those who lament that they don’t make ’em like they used to should be the first in line to watch The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare. This is pastiche at its finest, a whimsical homage to the stylish thrills of yesteryear. To echo Al Pacino’s line in Once Upon a Time . . . in Hollywood: What a picture!
