The Corner

Two-Simile Animals

I asked whether there is any other animal which, like the coot, shows up in

more than one common simile. A reader offers the following:

—Eats like a horse, strong as a horse.

—Eats like a bird, free as a bird.

—Strong as an ox, dumb as an ox.

—Fat as a pig, eats like a pig (admittedly, kinda related).

The coot is still ahead, though. Readers from various regions have assured

me that as well as being bald as a coot and crazy as a coot, you can also be

drunk as a coot and (oh boy) queer as a coot.

You may also, of course, assuming you survive your baldness, craziness,

drinking problem and queerness, end up as an old coot.

John Derbyshire — Mr. Derbyshire is a former contributing editor of National Review.
Exit mobile version