I hate to brag, but the flashback to Rich’s turkey frying debacle prompts me to boast that I cook the best turkey in all of Christendom, and I don’t use a deep fryer. I barbecue it on a Weber kettle, with the coals banked on each side, and adding hickory or apple wood chips for smoke flavor. The real key, though is cooking the turkey upside-down, so the breat meat stays moist. Takes about 2 hours for a medium-sized (@15 lbs) unstuffed turkey, or two-and-a-half hours if you stuff it.
Meanwhile, I am dismayed that the atrocious confection known as “turducken” (turkey stuffed with duck and chicken) continues to have its enthusiasts. Yeech.
Question for Jonah: What would we call a combination of turkey, pheasant, and duck? I thought so.