The vice president has figured out the midterms. It calls to mind Milton’s description of Eden, and the terrible folly by which mankind forfeited Paradise:
Of Trump’s first disobedience, and the war
That cost us House and Senate, sing our woe!
Before that sorry breach, what bliss was ours!
Round Eden rose the tariffs’ verdant walls,
And Commerce, thus entombed, yet flourished free.
With eminent, blooming ambrosial grifts
Of public gold; each office bore its fruit.
And ICE, like cherubim with flaming swords,
In either hand the hast’ning agent caught
Our ling’ring migrants, and to th’ Eastern Gate
Led them direct, to Kristi Noem’s acclaim.
All good to us was lost; and dearth became
Our plenty. We drank beef by the gallon.
And Trump, in naked majesty, seem’d lord
Of all, many people are saying; and worthy seem’d.
One law alone restrained his sovereign will:
Of Persia’s tree, thou shalt not taste the fruit.
Who first seduc’d Trump to that foul revolt?
Th’ infernal Serpent; Bibi, aye, whose guile
Stirr’d up with Envy and Revenge, deceiv’d
The lord of MAGA, and unleashed the war.
Then did the voters turn, in sudden wrath,
And cast their ballots for the serpent’s party.
O Paradise, by one transgression lost!