From a reader:
Ditto. Where I differ from you is that I strongly believe in established religion as a stabilizing social force, but I’ve never been able to wrap my mind around God. I’m sort of a reluctant atheist.
I enjoyed your point about silly people who try to customize their religion. I’ve always gone the opposite way. On those occasions when I participate in religious events (Passover, etc), I always opt for the conservative practice – otherwise, why bother?
Your opening point about asking people about their faith reminded me of the story my parents always told about their arrival in this country from Israel. They ended up in Kansas City, Missouri, which they always have said was a lovely, friendly community. What surprised them from the get-go was that everyone they met immediately (a) asked them what Church they attended and, without waiting for an answer, went to (b) a sales-pitch for their own Church. My Dad always found fascinating this concept of marketing your Church (not your faith; your Church). It is, of course, a distinctly American approach to religion.
Another point about faith. When I lived in Texas in the mid-1980s, I was frequently asked about my faith. When I identified myself as Jewish, many people responded with a moment of silence followed, not by an anti-Semitic remark or social withdrawal, but by an earnest request to reconsider finding Jesus. I was always flattered by this, rather than offended, since I felt it stemmed from a genuinely kind impulse to have me join the ranks of the saved, rather than a hatred of my Judaism. This differed profoundly from my experiences in England a few years before, when identifying myself as Jewish often resulted in ignorant remarks (“Are you rich?”) or actively anti-Semitic remarks (usually in the form of Auschwitz jokes). Perhaps that’s why I, unlike many Jews on the Left, am not afraid of American Christians.
Anyway, thank you for your very interesting thoughts. Obviously, they resonated with me at many levels.