Magazine | November 21, 2016, Issue

Old Business

TITLES OVER BLACK:

“Old Business”

FADE IN:

EXT. CAPITOL STEPS — MORNING

President-Elect Clinton’s breath steams in the chilly air. Supreme Court Justice John Roberts leads her through the oath of office. In the background, WE SEE Bill Clinton et al., looking on.

ROBERTS

I, Hillary Rodham Clinton . . .

PRESIDENT CLINTON

I, Hillary Rodham Clinton . . .

CUT TO:

INT. SHABBY MOTEL ROOM

Anthony Weiner sits on the bed, taking selfies with a Samsung Galaxy 7 Note. On the television:

ROBERTS (VOICEOVER)

. . . do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute . . .

PRESIDENT CLINTON (VOICEOVER)

. . . do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute . . .

Weiner’s phone suddenly EXPLODES. He is showered in molten, flaming

battery acid. As he screams in agony, tight on the TV screen as we

CUT TO:

EXT. CAPITOL STEPS –CONTINUOUS

ROBERTS

. . . the office of president of the United States . . .

PRESIDENT CLINTON

. . . the office of president of the United States . . .                                                   

CUT TO:

INT. GYM

Monica Lewinsky is on the StairMaster, watching the inauguration on the large screen above.

ROBERTS (VOICEOVER)

. . . and will, to the best of my ability . . .

PRESIDENT CLINTON (VOICEOVER)

. . . and will, to the best of my ability . . .

The StairMaster suddenly goes haywire, racing upward and downward, dashing Monica’s head against the rail and knocking her unconscious. As the inauguration proceeds, the machine drags her body into the gears. CAMERA PANS UP TO SCREEN AS WE:

CUT TO:

INT. JAMES COMEY’S OFFICE — CONTINUOUS

Director Comey sits in his office, watching the inauguration. His eyes are red.

ROBERTS (VOICEOVER)

. . . preserve, protect, and defend . . .

PRESIDENT CLINTON (VOICEOVER)

. . . preserve, protect, and defend . . .

Comey RAISES HIS SERVICE REVOLVER to his temple. PAN OVER to a MENACING MAN watching him impassively. The MAN has a cell phone in his hand. He holds it up, and WE HEAR a SINGLE SHOT.

MENACING MAN (into phone)

It’s done. Let them go.

CUT TO:

INT. VAN — CONTINUOUS

Several THUGS sit in the van, guarding a frightened family — wife, children, three old people. On the radio, WE HEAR:

ROBERTS (VOICEOVER)

. . . the Constitution . . .

PRESIDENT CLINTON (VOICEOVER)

. . . the Constitution . . .

A THUG puts his phone away and turns to the family.

THUG

You’re free to go.

The van door SLIDES OPEN. They’re in the middle of a large, empty park. The family starts to run for freedom.

CUT TO:

EXT. CAPITOL HILL –

CONTINUOUS

In the VIP area, Sidney Blumenthal watches the proceedings. Tears stream down his face as he watches in ecstasy.

ROBERTS

. . . of the United States.

PRESIDENT CLINTON

. . . of the United States.

CHEERS erupt from the crowd. Jostling, clapping, the crowd SURGES. A SHADOWY FIGURE bumps into Blumenthal, his hand grazing the back of Blumenthal’s neck.

BLUMENTHAL

Hey! Watch where you’re going, dumbass!

SHADOWY FIGURE

Sorry, sir.

Blumenthal mutters angrily as the figure retreats, then he blinks several times, touches the back of his neck, begins to wobble, and slips under the feet of the surging crowd. WE SEE his foaming convulsions as the poison takes hold, but the crowd’s eyes are focused on:

THE DAIS

where President Hillary Clinton stands waving in triumph. Cheers wash over her. She looks, somehow, 20 years younger. WE PAN OVER TO:

BILL CLINTON

In the first row, smiling and applauding, beaming with pride. Huma Abedin sits next to him, and they exchange happy glances. As the crowd roars:

HUMA ABEDIN (leaning over)

Would you care for a Mentos, Mr. President?

BILL CLINTON

Sure! Thanks!

She hands him the Mentos roll, with one Mentos already sticking out.

HUMA ABEDIN

Take that one, sir.

BILL CLINTON

Don’t mind if I do!

As he takes the Mentos, WE SEE President Clinton turning around to acknowledge the viewers behind her. Her eyes catch Huma’s.

There’s a barely perceptible nod. President Clinton smiles and nods back. Bill Clinton coughs a bit, then feels his left arm. He winces slightly.

President Clinton turns to the crowd, and as they quiet down she begins:

PRESIDENT CLINTON

My fellow Americans . . .

As we:

FADE OUT.

TITLES OVER BLACK: “Next week: New Business”

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