Magazine December 22, 2019, Issue

Certified Hogwash Free

Joe Biden arrives for a stop on his ‘No Malarkey!’ campaign bus tour in Emmetsburg, Iowa, December 2, 2019. (Brian Snyder/Reuters)

Joe Biden’s leg hairs go blond in the summer, he tells us. We could have gone the rest of our lives without having to think about Biden’s hairy shanks, but there’s no returning to that state of blissful ignorance now. The revelation came in the course of his describing his time as a lifeguard, a halcyon time to which his mind returns while speaking out loud, and he added that small children liked to play with his leg hairs, and that he liked it when little kids jumped in his lap. A while later he was photographed chewing on his

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