Does everybody benefit from the demise of the Senate immigration deal?
John McCain: “Yes! They just took away this issue that has the base hating me, so the only thing they hate me over is campaign finance reform and the Gang of 14!”
Mitt Romney: “Yes! They just took away this issue that I was being accused of flip-flopping on! Now I’m just accused of flip-flopping on my health care plan, and Iraq benchmarks, and abortion, and gay marriage, and…”
Rudy Giuliani: “Yes! They just took away this issue that I was opposed to, but never quite that outspoken about, with a bill that I insisted didn’t have the provisions I demanded, but bill proponents insisted was in there! Now I can still talk about the need to “secure the border” while referring warmly to our collective memory of Ellis Island!”
Tom Tancredo: “Whoohoo, this looks kind of like an actual policy win! Now let’s go after those darned legal immigrants!”
Every Democratic Nominee: “Whoohoo, we don’t have to let the public know that we support amnesty, or as we prefer to call it, the Democratic Party Base Expansion Program!”
Okay, I guess somebody loses:
Fred Thompson: “Dangit, I was gonna whup everybody over votin’ for this mess.”