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Welcome to the Homeland!

Just when the Italians were fi nally getting over the barbarian sacking of Rome 1,600 years ago, a bunch of invaders so savage they make Visigoths look like a marauding army of Helen Mirrens are headed their way.

The Guidos are coming! The Guidos are coming! Hide your children! Hide your spouses! Hide your hair gel. The second fall of the Roman Empire is upon us.

Yes, in the latest, ever-expanding racist portrayal of Italian-Americans on TV as brain-damaged house pets, the half-wits of “Jersey Shore” are being sent “back” to the old country to strut their stuff and embarrass all us normal Italian-Americans who are tarred with their tanning brushes. . .

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