President Obama’s hometown of Chicago still goes by the old nickname “Windy City.” But after three miserable decades of strict gun control and permanent Democratic rule, Chicago has cemented its reputation as America’s Bloody City.

No amount of statistical whitewashing can cover up the stains of the Left’s ideological failures there. But as Obama continues to wage war on law-abiding gun owners, his home team is trying its hardest to spread smiley-face lies upon damned lies to downplay Chicago homicide statistics.

On Monday, April Fools’ Day, Chicago mayor Rahm Emanuel and Chicago Police superintendent Garry McCarthy held a press conference to tout a “dramatic” drop in the city’s homicide rate. The headlines read: “March homicides drop dramatically in Chicago” (USA Today), “Murders fall 42 percent in America’s deadliest city: Chicago” (NBC News), and “March homicides drop 69 percent in Chicago” (Las Vegas Sun).”

Emanuel trumpeted the drop as a “good sign.” He hyped statistics to the Associated Press showing that first-quarter 2013 murders in Chicago are tied with numbers from the same time period in 2009. Murders decreased 69 percent compared with the same month last year; first-quarter homicides fell by 42 percent compared with the same time frame last year. Emanuel insisted: “We are clearly having an impact on the homicides.”

But it’s all in how you slice, dice, and spin it, of course.

Let’s face it. Gun-grabbers in Democratic-dominated cities have an institutional incentive to fudge the numbers. In New York City, which rivals Chicago when it comes to out-of-control gun-control regulations, a New York Police Department whistleblower recently exposed systemic manipulation of crime data.

As anti-Second Amendment crusader Michael Bloomberg made the rounds last spring touting the Big Apple as “the safest big city in America,” an internal NYPD report confirmed that more than a dozen crime reports had been manipulated — including felonies downgraded and incident reports deep-sixed — to lower the crime rate. As punishment for exposing the tampering and corruption, the whistle-blowing officer, Adrian Schoolcraft, who secretly taped the manipulation, was suspended and forced into a psych ward. He’s still fighting for justice and has never received an apology.

So, call me crazy, but I wouldn’t put it past Team Obama’s Chicago theater directors to goose their numbers to improve the optics for Dear Leader. Speaking of the lobbyist-in-chief, he parachuted into Colorado this week and surrounded himself with Denver-police-officer human props during a gun-control campaign event. The rank-and-filers were none too happy with being exploited for political purposes. “To protect and serve” is supposed to be a public safety imperative, not a campaign imperative.

But back to the Bloody City. In 2012, Chicago racked up the nation’s deadliest death toll, with 506 of its residents murdered. The murder rate has simply returned to its bloody business as usual over the past five years. Here’s the first-quarter death-toll breakdown:

2013: 70
2012: 120
2011: 75
2010: 75
2009: 70

The Second City Cop crime blog adds that Emanuel’s claim regarding the homicide rate dropping to levels not seen since the 1950s “is based solely on the population decrease in the city of Chicago. This is an amazing abuse of numbers, but as Mark Twain said, “There are lies, damned lies and statistics.” Welcome to “statistics.”

Local Chicago CBS 2 reporter Jay Levine didn’t buy the whitewashing bunk, either. He challenged City Hall with a piece entitled “City Touts Lower Homicide Stats, But Context Reveals Return To Normal.” Put simply, “2013’s 70 first-quarter homicides was a major improvement over 2012’s 120 — but not over 2011 or 2010 or 2009.”

While Emanuel sang “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” for the press, the Bloody City was still reeling after a six-month-old baby was shot and killed in gang crossfire. On Easter weekend, a mob of violent teens terrorized shoppers in the Magnificent Mile district. Similar outbreaks of racially driven attacks have escalated in Chicago under the reign of Daley-Emanuel-Obama. By some police estimates, gang violence accounts for up to 80 percent of the city’s homicides.

Plagued by juvenile delinquency, organized crime, ruinous government dependency, corruption, and out-of-control spending, these liberal-dominated hellholes have proved impervious to progressive “social justice” engineering. It’s the insane demagogues blaming guns who need their heads examined.

— Michelle Malkin is the author of Culture of Corruption: Obama and His Team of Tax Cheats, Crooks & Cronies. Her e-mail address is [email protected]. © 2013 Creators.com