Okay, bear with me, y’all. In my column today, I have a little item on soft drinks (as I have already said, here in the Corner); and a little item on “whiz.” This latter is a language item (has to do with spelling). Our crack publisher, Jack Fowler, sent me an image that combines the two: here.

He actually owns this sign. His wife, Sharon — eminently sensible woman — forbade him to hang it in the lavatory.