I’ve delayed announcing this to the public for fear of the social disruption it might cause. We’ve seen how earth-shattering events, like World War I, can quickly lead to wholesale revisions, and even rejections, of established norms and values. For example, I would not want to be responsible for an explosion of neo-Dadaism. But I feel the public has a right to know.

The Goldbergs are getting….wait for it….here it comes…that’s right: a cat.

Our daughter desperately wants one. My wife thinks Cosmo can handle it (and she really wants one too). I’m a good deal more nervous about the whole thing. And Cosmo doesn’t know.

I grew up with both cats and dogs. And contrary to the impression I have given to some folks, I do not in fact hate cats. I simply consider them inferior to dogs in most of the ways that matter to God, man, philosophers, history and Justice generally.

We will get a kitten over my daughter’s Christmas break, partly on the assumption that Cosmo will adjust to a kitten better. I suggested to the Fair Jessica that we auction naming rights on the NRO fundraiser. Alas, she didn’t go for it.

Anyway, there’s probably too much information here already. But I just thought Hood and his minions should know that I will be conducting a controlled experiment on the whole Dogs v. Cats thing. And, of course, I am completely unbiased.