Itโ€™s the Eurovision song contest this weekend! Blogger Kieran Healey explains the ghastly truth, but with two โ€“ truly shocking โ€“ errors.

โ€œThe Eurovision is the common cultural bond uniting generations of Europeans, the continentโ€™s one true collective ritual.โ€

He has, of course, forgotten internecine warfare.

โ€œCountries with no musical tradition worth speaking of, such as Britainโ€ฆโ€

What?