Massachusetts is broadening the jury pool:

A family is trying to figure out how their pet cat was summonsed for jury duty.
“I said, Sal, what’s this? You know, I don’t believe it I was shocked,” said Guy Esposito, Sal’s owner.

Fortunately, that’s so obviously ridiculous it can be straightened out easily, right?

Anna filed for Sal’s disqualification of service. However, the jury commissioner was unmoved and denied the request.
Sal’s service date at Suffolk Superior Court is set for March 23. Anna said that if the issue isn’t cleared up by then, she will simply have to bring the cat to court.

If a dog gets called up for the Khalid Sheikh Mohammed jury, can they move for a mistrial on grounds of gross Islamophobia?

Oh, but don’t worry, if Sal books a flight from Logan to Detroit and sneaks under the rope into the secure area, they’ll shut down the airport, disrupt plane schedules for days, and ensure that octogenarian spinsters called Kitty are on the no-fly list for the rest of their lives.