There was only so much he could take. Apparently the โaction manโ doll captured by the insurgents has started to talk. Heโs naming names. Heโs spilled the beans about Malibu Barbie and Buzz Lightyear. Heโs going to reveal GI Joeโs headquarters. The entire toy-industrial complex has been compromised.

About the Author
Jonah Goldberg is a National Review contributing editor.
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