Sacrifices I might have to make to get people to invest in NRO:

While being distracted and annoyed(yet again) by the insanely shiny lip
gloss of the FNC women, it finally occurred to me. The lip gloss is an evil
plot to distract women viewers while hemlines are on the rise! Think about
it, most women aren’t going to notice anything beyond that damn lip gloss.
In the name of “fair and balanced” reporting, I think you ought to start a
campaign to have Rick Leventhal and Greg Kelly report from liberated Baghdad
in shorts and tank tops(Heck I’ll even make a donation to NRO if you do) to
counter this evil plot!