From a reader:

Hi, Jonah, Since today is National Talk Like A Pirate Day, I took your press release over to http://www.talklikeapirateday.com/translate/index.php for a translation into Pirate-Speak: Arrr, the difficulties women have faced o’er the past 30 years and what t’ expect in the years ahead be highlighted in the lead article in the anni’ersary issue o’ me* Magazine – the official publication o’ Menopause The Musical®. Aye. Much better, Don’t ye think? Arrrrr!